I still remember the images of my own blood and him beating on me

[Tiyunna]

I remember moving to the city my ex lived to attend college. During my sophomore year I moved into my very first apartment. My ex was in a relationship with this army girl and she was not loving the fact that he wouldn't stop talking to me despite me stop talking to him. Following all the drama he somehow found out where I lived. I also struggle from PTSD. the second day of me staying at my apartment complex. I was leaving out the driveway and he chased me down the highway. I made a turn and it lead me to a dead end . he got out the car with his gun and told me to get out the car. I got out the car and begged for my life as he cocked the gun back. From that point on every knock at the door no matter what time of the day it was he was looking for me to beat on. He knocked on everyone door where I stayed at asking people have they seen me. I didnt't have the time nor the day to even sit at the house for 3 minutes without someone riding to my apartment complex to see if my car was in the driveway. The girl was repeatedly calling me and emailing me on facebook from fake pages. I changed my number three times and she got my new number every time. Apparently there was text messages and phone calls coming to my phone with my number displaying. I was harassed by his family members at my apartment every single day. my ex would take my phone after he beat me. The Police were called to my apartment over 35 times but later found out no call was ever recorded. The 911 dispatcher held every call for almost two hours and while he was beating me I tried to run out the door. His mom worked for Social Security services and she stole my social security number. Without me knowing the courts allowed my ex to use my social security number to file court cases without me ever being served. The only way I found out is when the State installed the new system Court Connect. There was people constantly saying they were calling the police for me. I had pictures of my license plate taken and sent to my phone from a person I didn't know. I had to go to the car dealership and swap out my cars to avoid being beaten or harassed every second I was home. His family somehow got a hold to the registration on my car and was telling people on facebook information about my car such as who owned my car. before the beatings started there were text messages sent to people phones using my number and I had no phone for 3 months because of this. The officers later identified the app known as "spoofing". He body slammed on the floor and kept repeatedly punching me. I was being thrown from wall to wall and repeatedly was being choked out until you seen black marks on my neck visibly clear. The people at the door always let me know they are calling the police. I always try to run to the door but he would grab me by my shirt and body slam me. he would put his heavy boot on my back to keep me from going anywhere while calling the girlfriend mom letting her know he was beating me. I went to the prosecuting attorney offices with bruises on me and my eyes were bloodshot red. The prosecuting attorney told me they couldn't accept my complaint because he filed charges on me first. I went to the Police Station trying to figure out why I wasn't get any help. Officers said he filed on you first so you can't file on him. One day I came home and found the police at my house again, this time with the mom. The mom brought her daughter and my ex boyfriend girlfriend over my house on the day of her deployment ceremony. I was sitting in my car waiting and really was fed up with being beaten and harassed constantly like this. I got out the car and as I walked to my apartment complex the sister and my ex girlfriend started running up the steps. I went into my apartment and called the police frantically. The police came over and the mom told the woman officer that I had a warrant. The lady officer told her to go get the warrant from the prosecutor and come back. Her daughter stayed at my house while they went and got the warrant. When they arrived back to my apartment complex the jail closed instantly only allowing felonies. The felony prosecutor tried to charge me with felony harassment. My ex wasn't at my apartment but he came to my apartment complex later when I was in the back of the car. When I went to the jail they released me instantly. So many was pissed off because her sons keep getting through the justice system because of drugs. I am constantly in tears because he is allowed to beat on me as he please. I had no phone at all after the matter to call the Police because he takes it or either come and break the phone so I wouldn't take any pictures. His brother is a big time drug dealer so I had to deal with the top sheriff calling me as well as Police Officers out of uniform at my apartment complex harassing me. The brother came into my home saying they have text messages coming from me and clearly I still had no phone. I asked him where the text messages was and he said he didn't know. The brother acknowledge he had officers taking pictures of me and watching me. The same people out of uniform answered my police calls in uniform and told me to just change my number and move. I came home very often to the police at my house because his mom would call and say I have a warrant. I cried and I cried because nobody was helping me. After my arrest I went to the Police Department to get the affidavit. The affidavit had another address listed so I wouldn't know. The very next day my house was broken into. I called the Police and they just walked in and said they were looking for drugs. They wouldn't take a report, they didn't ask me anything. They didn't take pictures of my apartment. The guys who broke in my house took the affidavit off the dresser as well as other court documents. Police Officers contacted the prosecutor and the boss but they got ignored. My lawyer also got ignored until the last minute. She also told my lawyer I got arrested at his house. All I see is my blood on the ground and all over my face. I finally moved out my house on a Sunday in 2014. My landlord called me Monday morning and said my ex mom called the police again to say I have a warrant. This harassment went on around the clock. No case was prosecuted against me because so many officers behind closed doors helped me. My case was compared to the Tracy Thurman case. They lived their life like a mafia family passing through the IRS with frauds and the son getting way with homicides because of drug trafficking to Florida. Nobody helped me I mean nobody would do anything. Something happened to me in which the FBI got called in. In 2015 the clerk who arranged all of this was arrested in gun charges and other charges. They also found the text messages inside of the Army girl phone and my ex mom phone. I kept making up excuses for him. He even picked up an electric heater and hit me upside the head with me. I didn't go to the hospital fearing for my life. The son is also getting ready to head to prison. 12 officers has also been fired. Innocent officers had Police calls logged under their badge id and they wasn't there at all. I cry every day because it hurts. All I can think about was him beating on me and nobody helped. The police officers who seen this happened took action on their own. I am afraid to go to Texas to college because he has family there and I am afraid he will see me down there and beat on me. He has family on law enforcement and it bothers me. I have plenty of protection now but the fear of seeing him again. I never faced him in court. I filed a complaint with the Army and nobody is surprised she orchestrated all of this. On my first court appearance right in the beginning of this, before court his mother tried to boost him up to fight me while in the waiting area, I just left. They wrecked my social security number with court cases and I even went to the court house to let them know. I went to Circuit court looking for answers. I wasn't allowed to talk to the court clerks or anybody. I was greeted by this guy by the courthouse door and he told me " I know who you are, him and his momma came to court so go before I arrest you" and I was asked to leave the building. I remember when it snowed and I had to go to the car to charge up my phone at 6 a.m. I looked to my left and my ex opened my car door, grabbed me by hair and pulled me out the car. It was ice on the ground and my blood was everywhere on the ground. His girlfriend came running down the hill and he took a old phone I only had to use. I had At&t wifi in my home so I was gonna have to use the internet that way. I still had no phone with service because I got rid of it already. I was willing to do anything for him to stop coming to my apartment beating on me like this. It was later found out the girlfriend at the time changed his facebook password and he thought I done it. The lady in the apartment building nextdoor screamed she was calling the Police as she was headed to work that morning. People were calling the Police and again it took almost 2 hours. I was afraid to go outside and was just ready to die. Nobody didn't do anything until the FBI got involved in my life on another incident. I cry everyday because I keep remembering me balled up in a fetal position. His sister and friends all thought it was funny that I was being beaten. I didn't respond or fight back so they kept meddling with me. he told me I wasn't gonna ever be sh*t in life and I am never gonna be blessed in life. he told me I was stupid and never will be anything in life. It was so much blood on the ground and on my floor. I even went to the prosecuting attorney office as a officer advised me to. He even called the Office while I was in the building. The prosecuting attorney told him "its all about who you know". In 2016, I got a lawyer because a judge stated that he was tired of this family and to not come back to his courtroom without one. On the Police Reports in the files, the detectives said they were being harassed by his family members constantly calling their office, armed services calling them cursing them out, along with family members in Law Enforcement asking why isn't anything being done. The detectives written in the reports that they asked my ex boyfriend to show the text messages and he refused to show the detectives. The detectives written down in the report also that he stated he had a order of protection against me. The detectives stated they checked and didn't find anything. This was kept from the courts and me. The DEA and other agencies were called in because this was a reaction in regards to her son being a drug trafficker to Florida. The clerk who participated in this was arrested and charged with stealing money for drugs and etc. Nobody helped me at all. I had to get up every morning and leave before his mom call the police to my house to say I have a warrant but actually didn't. All the blood and images won't go away and its really affecting me. I am now preparing to seek counseling because I can't handle this on my own anymore. I been out of the situation since 2014

[Tiyunna]

I am no longer in Arkansas anymore but I am preparing to move for college and I still think its not far enough

[Sam W]

Hi Tiyunna,

This was an incredibly terrible thing for him and his family to do to you, and I'm so sorry you had to go through it. As much as you can, please try not to blame yourself for what happened. You did what you thought you needed to do in order to survive, and you survived something no one should ever go through. Seeking counseling is a very wise decision, especially if you're having flashbacks at a level that's impeding your ability to live your life. Have you also connected to any domestic violence resources in your area? Or any resources at the college you'll be going to?

To confirm, you haven't had any contact from him since 2014?

There is a lot of heavy stuff in this account that you're dealing with right now. What can we do to best support you?

[Tiyunna]

Yes since 2014 and haven't seen him since.The last court date for the case because it was appealed a meeting was held in Circuit court just last year. The jail was closed down almost 8 months and after the arrest that took place at my house his twin brother was arrested the day after. I really thank the Officers who were helping behind close doors because each court visit I knew something was going on. I have seen officers express that they are sorry this happened to me and couldn't figure out why was this allowed. The last time I had to call the Police is when someone sent me a picture of my door along with stalking text messages. I looked out the window and seen it was his sister. I called the police that night and they was at my house under a minute. There was 7 cars lined up in the driveway and I even told them who it was. I moved that weekend and my landlord called me Monday to tell me the Mom called the police again saying I had a warrant but I didn't. When the officers knew I moved back home, a meeting was held to discuss the Domestic Abuse response procedures that actually made news. They changed the procedures and protocols. Their 911 call center was also done over again. The 911 communications manager was also fired. I had an accident shortly before I moved back home and I contacted the Police. The same lady that allowed them to go get the warrant took the call. She said "we keep running into each other" my license was suspended because they continuously played with it. The lady officer didn't log the call or check my driver license. She gave my driver license back with a citation. The wreck was thrown out along with every other court case null processed. The prosecuting attorney is now a deputy prosecuting attorney so authorities can see how many murder cases and other felonies she is messing up. I am researching counseling centers because I just can't handle this by myself as I thought I could. I haven't spoke about this until today out of the fear of being judged. I just want someone to talk to even if its on the internet. I lost my friends so I am by myself a lot. Since this situation I have endured repeated cycles. It hurts to get your rights taken away from you. The way he beat me should have never happened. It hurts to hear so many people stop you in the store or walk up asking " you that girl in (apartment complex name) that the boy be beating on" "dang girl thats messed up I be feeling bad they don't be helping you" I be so embarrassed. So many compare my case to Tracey Thurman. I had to go hide my car at the river park to prevent from being harassed so I can stay at home and get some sleep. It took me an hour to walk back home.

[Sam W]

That's a lot of awful, complex things for one person to bear, and it took a ton of strength to reach out to us for someone to talk to. Is the most helpful thing we can do right now give you a space to vent, with the understanding that you'll tell us if/when you need a different kind of support?

If there's more specific help you're looking for, we can also talk about the process of finding a counselor or help you connect to domestic violence resources. We can also help you brainstorm ways to build up your support network, since it sounds like you're feeling really isolated and alone right now.

[Tiyunna]

I am also going to speak with others about what happened to me. I wanna speak to other people as well because I just want to be around so much support. I held this in for as long as I could. His sister was speaking of this on Facebook while all this was going on, he went into the room and hit her. He doesn't wanna admit that he beat me at all. hes a coward

[Sam W]

Coward seems like an excellent way to describe him.

It's awesome that you're listening to the part of you that wants support and wants to speak about what happened. While everyone deals with trauma differently, talking about what happened and asking for help can be incredibly helpful. Have you looked into any survivor's groups where you could go for in-person support?

[Tiyunna]

yes I am actually and will be honored to do so. I remember the nights he sent his girlfriend mom to my apartment looking for me at 11 pm at night. I remember when drug dealers came through my patio door with such a habit I got tired and eventually moved. Not a day goes by I don't think about this and it hurts so bad. I had drug dealers looking for me to see was I at home or not, but my knowledge from some Police Officers played a big part in this. I always wanted a career in law enforcement so that chance is coming. I wanna be happy and play sports as a normal person without pushing people away from me.

[Tiyunna]

I remember the nights I lived with no lights, I couldn't even go to work out of fear. My mind wasn't completely there and still isn't. Domestic Abuse should be taken seriously and I am glad other States are changing their policies. I had three cars within a year trying to escape him and I was in a lot of debt. I had hardly no food and I didn't have the time to even leave for 5 minutes without the police actually being at your house when you come home. When I moved back to my hometown I found out my best friend was in trouble. She died as a result of domestic violence and I participated in her investigation. She also been trying to contact me for three months and after the domestic incident happened her family was trying to reach me.

[Tiyunna]

I was referred to this website by the hotline.org

[Sam W]

You're right that domestic violence should be taken more seriously than it often is, and that it takes such a huge toll on the people who are targets of it. You deserve every chance to have the life that you want.

I'm glad to hear hotline.org referred you to us. Is there a way you feel we could best support you?

[Tiyunna]

I just needed to vent and just talking to other people. nothing really just wanna talk to other people

[Sam W]

That's totally fine! Vent as much as you need to.
(So you know, I go off my shift soon, so if you don't hear from me again, that's why).

[Tiyunna]

thats fine! I thank you so much for talking to me. It really do feel better talking to someone. I got a long ways to go but its all worth it. I miss having fun but I know things might not be the same but at least ill be smiling again

[Mo]

I'm glad that you found us, and that talking about your experiences has been helpful for you.

[Tiyunna]

Thank you so much

[Sam W]

You're so welcome!