Pansexual ; Being sexually attracted to gay guys

[JayAlmonte]

I don't really know how to start this but I'm really curious to what "sexual orientation" am I? I'm born female and have tried searching and understanding if I was bi-sexual but can't seem to 'fit in'. Then I learned that theres "Pan-sexual" but there wasn't much to understand + I don't think there are others who are Pan . I'm generally/sexually attracted to gay guys and majority of the time have no interest in straight guys I do find them appealing but it's different when comparing to a gay guy. Like I would wish to be born again as a male just to be gay. I'm really confused since I don't have any attraction to girls or guys but just gay guys. I continuously ask myself What am I? I can't say 'I'm straight/Bi' cause it's really not me and I really want to open up to who I really am.
Am I Pansexual?

[Danny S.]

Hi there, welcome to the boards
It's definitely understandable to want a straight (haha) answer when it comes to your sexuality, but unfortunately I can't give you that. What I can give you are some resources to help you get a clearer view of your sexual orientation and hopefully make things a little easier for you!
First of all, can I ask how you identify gender-wise? If you don't have an answer that's fine, I just want to get some idea of where you're at! You mentioned wishing to be born as a different gender. If you want, I can send you some resources on gender identity. For now we'll stick to sexuality.
Pansexuality is generally understood to mean being sexually attracted to people of all genders. There are lots of people who identify as pansexual! I know at least three personally. Here's a great primer on sexual orientation that you should check out: The Rainbow Connection: Orientation for Everyone. You said you are usually only attracted to gay guys, but not straight ones- does this mean you only become attracted to a guy after he tells you his sexuality? What's "different" about straight men? Here's another resource that might be helpful to you: Q is for Questioning.
Hope these are helpful to you- let me know if you want to talk about gender identity as well!

[JayAlmonte]

Hi, and Thanks!
Gender-wise I'd say I'm female but I think I'm gender fluid~ (if that's okay)
Guys don't tell me they're sexuality but it's something like a 'gut feelings'(sorry it might sound wrong). I live in the Middle East and in my opinion there are differences between guys here~ (ㅠㅠ idk how to explain it though)
And also this was super helpful! Thank U!! *^^*

[Danny S.]

Of course it's okay! Would you like me to send you some resources on gender identity?
That makes sense, but maybe your attraction to them isn't necessarily gayness but instead the characteristics that lead you to perceive them as gay?

[KawaiiGarryNeko]

I am also sexually attracted to gay guys, and I never knew what to call myself. I've always thought of myself as straight, but around the time just before I turned fourteen (I'm almost at my half-birthday), I found that I was totally into gay guys (and you can sometimes tell by looking at how they act). I still like straight guys, but I like gay guys the most. I also think that Japanese and Korean guys are super hot, and the same is true for girls of the same race. What's happening to my brain? I was totally straight when I was thirteen!

[KawaiiGarryNeko]

Would I be pansexual, then?

[Alice O]

Hi OtakuKittieCat,

This is an area for users to post when they only want to talk with staff, not other users. I am going to go ahead and start a different thread for you, which you can find here: http://www.scarleteen.com/bb/viewtopic. ... 527#p34527.

[baekhyunah]

Hi! This is the first time I saw a situation that is same as mine that I literally have to create an account just to reply to this. It's so hard to find females who are sexually/romantically(?) attracted to gay guys. My type of gay guys are the one who are kind of small, delicate, soft? In short, twinks. I'm 17 (turning 18 this month) and I also (sometimes) wish that I'd be born as a male to be gay and to be in a relationship with them, have sex and such. I also don't know my sexual orientation yet. Thought I was a bisexual since i'm also sexually (but not romatically) attracted to females. I don't know if me being like turned on to gay guys is a fetish or something? But there is this strong urge for me to wish to become a male to be with them is this pansexuality? Or is there someone that had gone through this? Help us lmao

[Sam W]

Baekhyunah, please look at the comment Alice made above yours about how this area is for staff replies only. If you have questions, please make a new thread and we'll be happy to answer them.

[leniaharreola06]

Omg i thought i was the only one who felt this way. I also am attracted to gay men. It's not the fact that they're gay that i'm attracted to. It's more so just wishing i could be reborn as a male and gaining a relationship with them and doing sexual things. I identify as a female and I just want to know what my sexuality is. I've thought about being pansexual but I dont quite 'fit' the description. I even have a preference for what kind of guys im into, small fairly weighted soft men...I'm not attracted to women at all only men; gay men. Is there a name for this?

[Heather]

Honestly? I don't want to hurt your feelings or make you feel bad, but you're stereotyping here (and tokenizing a little bit, too): not all gay men look the same way. Small, "soft" men come in every orientation, and there are also loads of gay men that don't look anything like that. How gay men look is literally as diverse as how men of every other orientation do, you know? Too, if you're talking about men who present as femme, that's also something that isn't exclusive to gay men. Bisexual and other queer men as well as straight men are also men who can and do present as femme (they just often feel less supported in it and allowed to do it, sadly, including by straight women).

I also hear you expressing what sounds like a desire to yourself be male, but since you say you identify as a woman, it doesn't sound like this is about being potentially trans or nonbinary for you. However, I'd have to hear more from you on all of this to get a better sense of things. From the outside and only what you said here, it sounds to me like this might just be about you being attracted to your own IDEA of gay men and what it's like to be a gay man more than anything else. But what you posted here was pretty brief.

Since this was someone else's thread in an area people post who ONLY want to talk to staff though, if you want to have more of a conversation about this, I'll need to ask you to start your own thread in this area or in one of the other parts of the board. Thanks!