Am i making a fuss?

[samy5]

Hi,
During sex, i realized a sticky, gelly fluid aroun my vagina and at first i thought there was something wrong with the condom and we stopped an look: there wasn't any hole or anything. It was probably some vaginal fluid we thought(it seemed a bit yellowish but i can't remember for sure) and we didn't think too much about it. But then i panicked, then my boyfriend panicked and i took an EC(1.5 mg Levonorgestrel) after 5 hours from intercourse. How can we differ vaginal fluids from meni or pre-cum? We looked condom after the sex and there was nothing. Maybe it leaked from the base of the condom but my boyfriend says there was nothing around it except the lube. We were only using condom as a birth control method( we read the condom basics in your website) and while using it we tried our best. Am i making a fuss? I am thinking even the EC will not work. Thank you already, your site is really helpful.

[Sam W]

Hi samy5,

I'm so glad you're finding the site helpful! Condoms are designed so that, if they are used correctly, fluid is not going to leak out of the base. So as long as the condom you used did not break (which would have been very noticeable) or come off during sex, you can assume it did its job.

Overall, how comfortable are you feeling with the decision to have vaginal sex? I ask because it sounds like you have some anxiety around this incident, and that's often a sign that you might want to consider only engaging in sexual activities where you're completely comfortable with any risks involved.

[samy5]

Thank you for the answer! Actually it took really long time to make this desicion. My boyfriend opened this subject at the beginning of our relationship. It was too early and i had doubts so i said no for a while. But as the time passed we deeply connected i really love him. I thought we both deserve a proper, healthy and safe sex life together. The pregnancy risks seemed really low when i read about condoms so i finally decided to do it. But i see now, we both are not ready to take this risk. I don't know how long this will take. When we are in a mood like we really want each other and have a certain boundary to keep going it becomes hard and stressful for us.

[Sam W]

You're welcome! It sounds like what might be helpful for you and your boyfriend right now is to read up on how to figure out what boundaries to set to keep you both comfortable. The two of you can also talk about figuring out some ways to hold to those boundaries when you get really aroused. These articles are a great place to start learning how to do both those things:
Ready or Not? The Scarleteen Sex Readiness Checklist
Risky Business: Learning to Consider Risk and Make Sound Sexual Choices
Sorting Maybe from Can't-Be: Reality Checking Partnered Sex Wants & Ideals

[samy5]

Hi me again:),
Thanks the articles are great. I want to ask about the periods after taking ECPs. I think i am having my period today, after 8 days from taking the pill. But i am not sure if it is a side effect of the pill. It feels like a period but since i don't know the difference between them i wanted ask you.

[samy5]

By the way i was expecting my period between the days 17-22. So it came a bit early. Sorry for the grammatical mistakes.

[Sam W]

You're welcome! One possible side effect of the pill is disruption of your menstrual cycle. So that could mean your period coming earlier or later than expected, and that could be what's happening to you now. You can read more about the possible side effects of EC here: Emergency Contraception (Plan B or the Morning-After-Pill)

[samy5]

So the blood is ligten compared to my usual periods. Can this mean it is an implantation bleed?

[Sam W]

EC can also make your periods slightly different than you're expecting (although even when you haven't taken EC, it's common to have the amount of period flow vary from month to month). At this point, your best option is to go through this piece and follow the recommendations it gives for your specific situation: The Pregnancy Panic Companion . I'd also ask that you to read over the pregnancy scare policy we have listed on the message boards before continuing this conversation.

[samy5]

Sorry for too many silly questions So i understand EC can cause different periods but i am really confused. Because i was expecting my period and i know EC can cause bleedings then i have a bleeding but this very same time EC bleeding can occur. How can i know it is my period or an EC side effect like intermenstrual bleeding?