when you think hes cheating

Questions and discussions about relationships: girlfriends, boyfriends, lovers, partners, friends, family or other intimate relationships in your lives.
nikkibaker
not a newbie
Posts: 23
Joined: Tue Feb 27, 2018 2:30 pm
Age: 23
Awesomeness Quotient: my heart
Primary language: english
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: staight
Location: aberdeen wa

when you think hes cheating

Unread post by nikkibaker »

me and my boy friend have been together for a while but hes becoming distant and when i was with him hed let me use his phone but now when ever i ask he always has to delete stuff first there was a contact named girl in his phone with a hey then a kissy face next to it i dont know what to do i asked him who she was and he grabed his phone and deleted the convorsation really fast i have no idea what to think i feel like hes cheating but he acts like it wasnt anything i dont know what to do
Heather
scarleteen founder & director
Posts: 9703
Joined: Sun Jul 27, 2014 11:43 am
Age: 54
Awesomeness Quotient: I have been a sex educator for over 25 years!
Primary language: english
Pronouns: they/them
Sexual identity: queery-queer-queer
Location: Chicago

Re: when you think hes cheating

Unread post by Heather »

I'd start by being honest and asking if you can talk with him about something serious.

Then you can just ask him if he is doing anything outside your relationship that doesn't square with agreements you have made (I don't know what agreements about exclusivity you have made). You will see how you feel about his answer to you, both with what he says with his words, but also his behaviour.

Do you feel able to start a conversation like that?
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead
nikkibaker
not a newbie
Posts: 23
Joined: Tue Feb 27, 2018 2:30 pm
Age: 23
Awesomeness Quotient: my heart
Primary language: english
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: staight
Location: aberdeen wa

Re: when you think hes cheating

Unread post by nikkibaker »

i did but we broke up yesterday
Sam W
previous staff/volunteer
Posts: 10320
Joined: Mon Jul 28, 2014 9:06 am
Age: 33
Awesomeness Quotient: I raise carnivorous plants
Primary language: english
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: queer
Location: Coast

Re: when you think hes cheating

Unread post by Sam W »

Ooof, that's a hard way to have a conversation like that end, even if it was ultimately they right choice. It's also often better to end a relationship that's gone past it's expiration date rather than stay in it and be unhappy. If you need it right now, we have this article to help you get through a break-up: Getting Through a Breakup Without Actually Breaking . Are there other ways we can support you right now, or other questions you'd like to ask?
And you to whom adversity has dealt the final blow/with smiling bastards lying to you everywhere you go/turn to and put out all your strength of arm and heart and brain/and like the Mary Ellen Carter rise again.
nikkibaker
not a newbie
Posts: 23
Joined: Tue Feb 27, 2018 2:30 pm
Age: 23
Awesomeness Quotient: my heart
Primary language: english
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: staight
Location: aberdeen wa

Re: when you think hes cheating

Unread post by nikkibaker »

i just dont know what to do im holding in my emotins so that my friends and people i care for dont see im broken inside me and him were getting ready to move in together so i dont understand what happened
Heather
scarleteen founder & director
Posts: 9703
Joined: Sun Jul 27, 2014 11:43 am
Age: 54
Awesomeness Quotient: I have been a sex educator for over 25 years!
Primary language: english
Pronouns: they/them
Sexual identity: queery-queer-queer
Location: Chicago

Re: when you think hes cheating

Unread post by Heather »

For now, I think we should focus on your other thread where you are describing an assault from this (I assume) person.
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead
Post Reply Previous topicNext topic
  • Similar Topics
    Replies
    Views
    Last post