Uncomfortable about doctors

[Themimsy42]

I'm rather awkward in general around people but especially when it comes to my body, even when with other people I trust. Lately it's been agreed that there may be a medical issue and I should go to the doctor to get it checked out.

I have never made any kind of doctors appointment before and I'm not sure I'd even be comfortable discussing the issue with someone face to face, let alone actually letting someone perform a visual inspection or diagnosis. Does anyone have any tips for reducing discomfort when talking to the doctors and avoiding conversations about it in general. (E.G. How to ensure I get a male doctor, keep it confidential etc)

I am over 18 and live in the UK

[Heather]

Welcome to the boards.

It's so common for people to have and experience medical anxiety, and it's hardly surprising. The medical field and the way so much of it is set up really isn't conducive to feeling emotionally safe or comfortable.

What can help is to first sort out, as specifically as you can, what is giving you the most anxiety. Then, what you can do is look at what you can do to manage it. I'd be happy to talk both of these things through with you to help you come up with a plan so that you can start getting healthcare when you need it.

[Themimsy42]

I've made things like dentists appointments before on my own so it's not really the social anxiety.

It's just I've never spoken to anyone about the problem before and I think I'd feel really uncomfortable discussing my private areas with a stranger of such authority especially if it turns out everything is fine and I just went through it all to waste their time for nothing

[Heather]

Might it help to talk about that here, first? We're someone else, and we work in healthcare, but we're not in person. So, if you think a half-step like that can help, we can do that!

You're not wasting a healthcare providers time if nothing is wrong, btw. They get paid no matter what, and conversations with patients who are well is part of the job.

[Themimsy42]

Well I'm a male and basically I think the problem is a lack of elasticity in my foreskin. Attempting to pull it back even flaccid can be difficult and putting it back is difficult too. If I'm erect then it's impossible to pull back fully and only goes around halfway and can be very difficult to get it back in it's original position. This can make sex kinda painful unless I use a condom and a lot of lube to prevent it getting pulled back.

To make things more difficult I only recently discovered that the foreskin was supposed to be pulled back fully and possibly as a result of this the head is extremely sensitive. As in touching it with tissue paper to clean it is painful let alone touching it directly. Even cleaning it is difficult as it produces a small burning sensation when I slowly drip water on it, let alone how it would feel to put it under a shower and try and use soap to clean.

This could be a problem as if the doctor simply recommends circumcision it could really prevent the ability for me to do my work for a week or two with that constant pain whenever it touches fabric before it desensitises.

Does any of this sound reasonable?

[Heather]

Generally, it should be okay if a foreskin doesn't go all the way back. The issue is less about how far it goes back (so long as it can move over the head of the penis) as it is about if it feels okay when it does. If someone is experiencing any pain or discomfort as it moves, especially with things where it should be able to freely, like with basic hygiene, or masturbation or any other kind of sex. It sounds like that might be an issue for you. It also sounds like it's tight enough that even though you can move it, it doesn't exactly glide easily.

So, yeah, I'd suggest you do talk to a healthcare provider about it if you're able. That sounds like a good idea to me.

Generally, just so you know, circumcision is a last-resort choice doctors will suggest for just about any issue, so I don't think you need to be too concerned that would be the first or the only recommendation. But even in the event it was, it's not something that would create constant pain or debilitation after you had it done. However, it seems to me fretting about that is putting the cart way before the horse, you know?