Sexuality

[Martian14]

Hey! So I’m super duper confused with my sexuality, and I know I never really have to put a label but it’s just been confusing me. I came out as bi a year and a half ago. But I’ve been realizing lately on all my past crushes and relationships with guys and I never was attracted to them sexually. Romantically yes, because I fell inlove with a guy before and he was the first person I ever fell in love with. But I never wanted anything to go sexually. With girls on the other hand when ever I have a crush on one I have both romantic and sexual feelings. I’ve also looked in the past when I was a kid I had butterfly’s for girls all the time, and when a guy gave me attention I started to “like” them. If that makes sense? So my question is what does this mean? Or like what can this mean?

[Sam W]

Hi Martian14,

So, one thing this could mean is that you experience attraction to different genders in different ways. That's actually quite common for people who are bi, and this article does a good job of explaining it: http://www.scarleteen.com/article/advic ... _and_women .

More important than what we think this could mean is whether you think it means anything major in terms of your identity. For instance, has noticing this pattern left you feeling like bi might not be the term that best matches your identity? Or is it more that you've noticed this pattern and feel like it fits into how you currently identify just fine (or something else entirely)?