No privacy

[Tania]

I am Tania, 19 years old, and I started masturbating when I was 15 years old. I used to masturbate frequently and I do it either in my bedroom or bathroom at my home. I stay at college hostel now and I share the room with another girl(twin sharing). I am unable to find private space to masturbate due to this. I tried it in shower but it doesn't work for me as I am not comfortable with masturbating in a hostel shower. Once, I tried masturbating in my bed at night while wearing skirt(without panties underneath) but it didn't work(didn't get aroused much) out as I couldn't watch porn because my roommate would find out that I am bad girl. I am struggling to sort this issue as I am not getting privacy to release my sexual frustration. I am scared to do it in room while my roommate is away because I am worried that she would walk in and see me getting off. Please suggest me a way to tackle this situation. I don't use sex toys for masturbation.

[Siân]

Hi Tania,

It can be hard to find privacy when you are sharing your space with other people. I would think that maybe you can have a conversation with your roommate about how you live together and give each other space and privacy. This doesn't have to mean talking about masturbation! More sitting down together and agreeing what things you'd like in place to make sure everyone is comfortable. This includes how clean you want to keep your room, when and if you can bring friends around and how you respect alone time. Maybe you can agree things like saying how long you'll be out for, and texting if you're coming back sooner so that you can feel comfortable that you have some time. What do you think?

Also, whilst I'm not saying you need to talk to your roommate explicitly about masturbation, it is really nothing to be ashamed of! There is nothing bad or wrong about masturbating, most people do or have at some point in their lives so I'm certain you're not the only one at your college hostel having to figure this out. You might like this: Is Masturbation Okay? (Yep.). Does that help?

[Tania]

Hi Sian,

I thought of talking about masturbation to my roomie but didn't feel like to talk about it to her since she is from conservative background and would not accept my views on masturbation. So I decided to find an alternative to allow me more privacy while masturbating. Recently, I started going to the room of another friend who also does masturbation often and decided to do it together. She is cool with this and does not see me as an intrusion into her private space.We watch porn together and masturbate and this has really helped to have an intense orgasm .