Worried

[KylieS03]

Hi so I'm new to this( 16 years old). This senior that I’ve been talking to these past few months and I had sex a couple weeks ago and in the middle of it the condom broke inside me but he said he didn't come. Well fast forward to present time my period was supposed to arrive yesterday but never did even though I've had quite a few PMS symptoms. I'm honestly rly scared because I didn't do any plan B and I'm under 18 so it's not like I can really keep it. I'm really worried and not sure how to continue, should I try buying a pregnancy test? Are people under 18 allowed to buy them? I don’t know how to approach the senior either, I haven’t mentioned yet because we are more like friends with benefits and I didn’t wanna stress him till I realized it was truly late. Tysm for reading this

[Heather]

Hey, Kylie: I moved this post to its own thread, because it would have derailed the thread you added it to. In the future, just start your own threads for your own topics.

It sounds like it';d be a good idea for you to take a pregnancy test, for sure. Anyone of any age can buy them.

In terms of talking to the person you had sex with, I'm not sure why you feel like it's your job to manage their stress? They chose to have sex with you, just like you did with them, and they chose to take the risks you did. Being FWB shouldn't mean that anyone involved can't talk to the other person about anything related to the sex you're both having. If you feel that way, I'd talk to this person about that or reconsider this relationship, because that sounds very isolating and also super-crummy.

That said, is he who you WANT to talk to about this? Is he someone you expect would be caring and supportive and helpful, or...?

[KylieS03]

Thank for getting back, I honestly am a little scared of approaching him because if I am ( knock on wood) I’m worried he will completely cast himself out of my life. He recently just got his own apartment and no longer goes to my school and is going to college in the fall semester. So to sum it up, no I don’t think he would be very supportive. My best friend already knows about this... but other than that nobody really in my life knows that much about this. I was thinking of telling my aunt who is a nurse and lives in the same town if this were to be true, I just can’t tell my parents . Is that wrong I don’t want to tell them?

[Heather]

You know, I'd say that if someone who was part of sex that could create a pregnancy for someone else would totally ditch that person if they voiced concern about a pregnancy, that would be a person you SHOULD detach yourself from. I also think if you feel clearly this person would not be supportive of you in situations like this, you should strongly reconsider being sexual with them. Why be sexual with someone like that, who either lacks the maturity or the empathy to be a decent sexual partner in one of the most basic ways? Even if the sex is really good, I assure you it can be as good -- and usually better -- with someone who would also treat you with some super basic care and respect. <3

I don't think there's a "wrong" about who we do or do not want to talk to during a scare. Who you talk to should be 100% about what you want and what feels like it best supports you, or otherwise gives you what you need right now. If that's us and your best friend and not your parents and the dude who was part of this (though again, I wouldn't suggest still sleeping with said dude), then it is. This is about what you need.

[KylieS03]

The pregnancy test came back negative... but I still don’t have my period. What I was thinking of that is if doesn’t come by the end of the week to re take one again just to be sure. As for the guy I kinda broke things off with him and realized he honestly didn’t care that much about me, it’s sad knowing he’s been a real problem with my past relationships and friendships overlooking his obvious red flags. Hopefully without him things will get a lil better XD

[Jacob]

Hi Kylie,

Good on you for breaking things off with him. I'm absolutely sure things will get better. They always do when we get to a safer distance from people who make it worse!

[KylieS03]

I’m not sure if my period is even coming this month anymore, it’s five days late and it hardly ever skips or comes late( if anything comes a little early)

[Sam W]

Hi Kylie,

Even if you have a fairly regular cycle, odds are you'll have a few periods that arrive later than expected (too, how you're tracking it in the first place can influence how accurate that predicted start date is). At a certain point, the quickest way to alleviate your stress around this is to take a pregnancy test. Have you been able to get your hands on one?