Confused

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pianolover
not a newbie
Posts: 78
Joined: Fri Jan 18, 2019 7:21 pm
Age: 23
Awesomeness Quotient: I am easy to talk to
Primary language: English
Pronouns: she/her
Location: California

Confused

Unread post by pianolover »

It has been a month since I've been active! I've been busy and havent found myself with any questions to ask. But scarleteen has been helpful in the past. I have a situation that has presented itself to me. Someone(a guy from work) I like has told me that they move a lot and relationships are hard for him.. So i took that as a vague rejection. I respected it we still talk a lot and i dont know what i should do. If i shouldnt talk to him as much or if i should have hope that he'd change his mind but i want to be respectful of him and of myself. Any tips?
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Sam W
previous staff/volunteer
Posts: 10320
Joined: Mon Jul 28, 2014 9:06 am
Age: 33
Awesomeness Quotient: I raise carnivorous plants
Primary language: english
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: queer
Location: Coast

Re: Confused

Unread post by Sam W »

Hi Lostand_found,

Nice to see you again!

If a crush has either directly or indirectly signaled they're not interested, we advise people to treat that as the forever answer. That way, you don't invest a ton of emotional energy hoping for a change of heart that isn't likely to happen and you can start deciding what kind of relationship (if any) you want to have with them now that you know they're not an option as a partner. Given that you two work together, a sound path forward would be to keep your interactions friendly and professional, but not seek out extra contact or do other things that might prolong the crush. Does that seem doable?
And you to whom adversity has dealt the final blow/with smiling bastards lying to you everywhere you go/turn to and put out all your strength of arm and heart and brain/and like the Mary Ellen Carter rise again.
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pianolover
not a newbie
Posts: 78
Joined: Fri Jan 18, 2019 7:21 pm
Age: 23
Awesomeness Quotient: I am easy to talk to
Primary language: English
Pronouns: she/her
Location: California

Re: Confused

Unread post by pianolover »

It seems doable! Thanks!
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Sam W
previous staff/volunteer
Posts: 10320
Joined: Mon Jul 28, 2014 9:06 am
Age: 33
Awesomeness Quotient: I raise carnivorous plants
Primary language: english
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: queer
Location: Coast

Re: Confused

Unread post by Sam W »

You're welcome!
And you to whom adversity has dealt the final blow/with smiling bastards lying to you everywhere you go/turn to and put out all your strength of arm and heart and brain/and like the Mary Ellen Carter rise again.
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