Questions about my labia

[Everglow]

And I think it took me 10 minutes just to get the courage to type the word labia. It's not a normal word I type out. LOL!
I have a large labia. I have looked at photos online and I know I have a large labia.
My first question is will my labia grow any larger? Anyway from keeping it from growing?
Second question does anybody know a secret on how to ride a bike? I am referring to the pain that goes with the seat. Doesn't happen often but it happens
I know my family doctor will give me an exam before I turn 15 and not just in a few more months. I am a bit worried on any pain that goes with that. I feel like everything is in the way.
I am still a virgin, but I worry on the pain that would go with it. Is the labia going to be in the way and cause more pain?
And not really a question but on a few occasions I have been on the school bus and I come close to an orgasm because of the vibration from the school bus. I guess that's because of a large labia? I kind of learned how to get around that by sitting on a large flat book.
And how normal is it to have a large labia at my age and do boys find it attractive?
And please don't laugh at any of my questions. Took a lot of courage to type that out. LOL! I'm nervously laughing just typing it out.

[Mo]

Hi there, Everglow, and welcome to Scarleteen.

I'm glad you were able to ask us all these questions about your labia, and don't worry; we're here to answer questions that feel scary or silly and certainly won't laugh at any of them.
There's a pretty wide variation in how large/long someone's labia might be, so even if yours feel "large" to you, that doesn't make them abnormal, weird, or unattractive in any way. There isn't anything you can do to keep them growing, the same way you can't keep yourself from getting taller; we can't know if they'll see any more growth or changes or not, but it isn't something you can impact yourself.
If you're having pain when riding a bike, you may have luck tucking your inner labia inside your outer labia when you put on your underwear or biking gear; that's not an uncommon thing for people to have to figure out how to do if they have inner labia that ever hang past the outer ones. (Again, this is super normal and not weird for labia to do!)
We actually have a bunch of information on inner labia, the idea that they can be too long/large, and all the questions that come with that worry, here: Give'em Some Lip: Labia That Clearly Ain't Minor. I think reading through that might set your mind at ease some; we can certainly talk about further questions or concerns you have after reading through it, but I hope it'll clear some of this up for you!

[Gone.Sorry.]

You've been given a lot of information to go over already, I know! But I see you mentioned being concerned about getting an exam from your family doctor. If you're talking about a gynecological visit, ScarleTeen also has an awesome and thorough overview of what to expect for that here: Your First Gynecologist Visit. Reading over what to expect might help calm your nerves! I think the unknown and even the way this component of health is treated in media really makes gyno visits seem like much bigger, scarier deals than they are!

[Everglow]

taking advice from a guy about tucking in my labia is so wrong, lol! But I will try that. I did read that long article, my labia is not too big but it is uncomfortable on a bike and like I said can be arousing on a bus, I think it's because of the hard plastic seats.
I wish I could be more happy with it. It looks strange, feels strange. Sometimes worry on what a boy would think when he looks at it.
Goose yes I am talking about a gynecologist visit, but it's my family doctor who will do it. She is nice. I did see her for a sports exam recently and she talked with me about doing this exam before I turn 15.But after reading the other long article I am wondering why this is needed? I am not sexually active. Does fingering and other object count as a need?

[Amanda F]

Hi Everglow,

I'm glad you were able to read the article! Hopefully it helps to show that this is a super common thing.

We don't get enough representation of vulvas and labia to really understand just how diverse they are, so I understand why you might be feeling that they look strange. One of my favorite instagram accounts is @the.vulva.gallery (note - there are images of vulva here, so you may want to wait until you're not in public to view them). They do beautiful watercolor paintings of every vulva you can imagine - including those with long inner labia - and include short stories from the people whose vulvae they feature. It has really helped me become more comfortable with my own anatomy, and after seeing so many different bodies, I really feel like every body is beautiful - no matter now large or small the labia!

What are some ways that you could feel more positively about your labia? Do you associate any good things with them?

For your first gyn exam, your doctor may not do an actual pelvic exam (where they look at and/or touch your genitals to examine them). Doctors recommend that you have your first gynecological exam between the ages of 13 and 15, but that can just be a meeting with your doctor to talk about your body developing and changing, periods, etc. Even though you aren't sexually active, your body is still about to undergo (or maybe already undergoing) some changes that relate to your hormones and sexual anatomy, so meeting early with your doctor to talk about those changes can be helpful. Fingering or inserting other objects doesn't really necessitate a pelvic exam, unless you're experiencing pain, which your doctor may then be able to help you with.

[Everglow]

Looked at the photos and I did see one or two that could be like what I have. I like the way I look and I love my breasts and I love my hips, but my labia is just out of place. When I look at the mirror it looks like something hanging off that needs to be removed. The only good thing I like about it is that I get more sensation and I have more to play with, but sometimes I think some stuff can also get in the way. I do keep my hair natural this way I can hide it from view, but shaving still happens.
Inserting objects can sometimes cause pain but I do go slow with it. I think the pain comes from the pressure of the lips itself and being pushed in. I have a jar of vaseline and it helps.

[Sam W]

Hi Everglow,

It sounds like you're already trying to frame your labia in a more positive way, which is awesome! I actually think this article might help you frame it in a new way for yourself even more: Vagzilla! (Or, All Genitals Great and Small). When you say you think "some stuff can also get in the way" can you be a little more specific?

If you're not aroused when you're trying to insert things, it's pretty common to feel a little discomfort, or to at least have the feeling of "yeah, this is not my favorite sensation." Lube is definitely your friend in those instances, and if you're noticing that pain when you try to masturbate, that might be a sign to slow down and take more time to build arousal.

[Everglow]

Hi Sam,
When I say stuff can get in the way I am talking about my labia itself. It covers everything up, lol! I gotta move stuff around so that I can find the hole :~)
Masturbation has been on the sore side sometimes. I only do a finger or two and I am okay but it's other things that can be a little painful. I have to open everything up so that I can get in, and this can be a nightmare.
FYI this topic is still by far the strangest thing I have ever talked about :~)

[Siân]

It's not so unusual to need to use your fingers to gently spread your labia apart when you want to insert something into your vagina - definitely not something you need to worry about!

If you're feeling some discomfort when masturbating, then it's all about going slow, being really aroused and a good water-based lube (better than vaseline and safer for toys, condoms etc. if you come to using them). A lot of the advice here applies whether you're having sex with a partner or with yourself: From OW! to WOW! Demystifying Painful Intercourse. Again, gently using your fingers to position your labia so they don't "catch" if you are wanting some form of sex with entry works for some. Ultimately, sex shouldn't be painful so take some time figuring out what works for you!

Oh, and re: your mention of cycling up the thread, you can also try one of the saddles designed specifically for folks with vulvas that has a hollow/dip in the middle rather than sitting on a hard ridge.

FYI this topic is definitely not the strangest thing we've ever talked about - in fact it's exactly the kind of thing we're here for!

[Everglow]

I would send that OW to WOW story to this guy I am going out with, but I don't want him thinking any wrong ideas either.

Maybe it's normal, but it still feels unusual to use fingers to spread everything out. It still feels wrong that I have something so big for my size. Call it normal but I am not a fan.

And I will do some research on saddles. I never knew that. Thanks.

[Sam W]

Hi Everglow,

If you're thinking of sharing that article with someone, are you worried that he'll be insulted if you share it? Or more that he'll think you're ready to try certain sexual things when you're actually not?

I will say that it can take some time to get used to having a part of our body that we feel doesn't look how it's "supposed" to. We've covered a few ways of addressing those feelings in this thread, but time in and of itself, and giving yourself permission to be patient as you get used to your body, is also a factor.