Bottom Surgery confliction?
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Bottom Surgery confliction?
Apologies if this is the wrong place to submit this, first time posting and all. So since realizing I'm trans I've thought like, a lot about different things but in this case I honestly still don't know which way I lean? The lowdown of what's up is basically I'm not entirely sure if I'd prefer having my current genitalia or going through bottom surgery. It's a big thing to think about and seeing as it's only been in the past year that I realized I'm a trans woman it makes sense that I don't necessarily have everything figured out, but I'm still unsure of how I lean on this issue
It kind of boils down to like, I very much enjoy the idea of having a vagina however there are times where I generally enjoy having a penis as well which ends up complicating matters. I feel like having a vagina would make things like masturbation and (when it happens) sex more comfortable, but I still have a rough time figuring out if I'd rather get surgery or not.
All of this is hypothetical of course seeing as if I do get bottom surgery it won't be for a while, but I'm curious if this is something other people have dealt with and if so how to sort of, figure out what would be best.
It kind of boils down to like, I very much enjoy the idea of having a vagina however there are times where I generally enjoy having a penis as well which ends up complicating matters. I feel like having a vagina would make things like masturbation and (when it happens) sex more comfortable, but I still have a rough time figuring out if I'd rather get surgery or not.
All of this is hypothetical of course seeing as if I do get bottom surgery it won't be for a while, but I'm curious if this is something other people have dealt with and if so how to sort of, figure out what would be best.
May you find your rest where no shadows are cast, and no eyes may see you slumber
Adelard Dekker, The Magnus Archives
Adelard Dekker, The Magnus Archives
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Re: Bottom Surgery confliction?
Hi Spider_Queen,
As you said, you've got some time before surgery is on the table as an option, so one thing to keep in mind is that your feelings around if/when you want to get bottom surgery may change as you learn more about yourself.
On a really basic level, making things like Pro/Con lists can help with these sorts of decisions, because they give you a way to work through not only your feelings about your different options, but also the benefits or drawbacks of each one. So, if you haven't already tried that, it could be a helpful exercise.
As you said, you've got some time before surgery is on the table as an option, so one thing to keep in mind is that your feelings around if/when you want to get bottom surgery may change as you learn more about yourself.
On a really basic level, making things like Pro/Con lists can help with these sorts of decisions, because they give you a way to work through not only your feelings about your different options, but also the benefits or drawbacks of each one. So, if you haven't already tried that, it could be a helpful exercise.
And you to whom adversity has dealt the final blow/with smiling bastards lying to you everywhere you go/turn to and put out all your strength of arm and heart and brain/and like the Mary Ellen Carter rise again.
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Re: Bottom Surgery confliction?
It may also be helpful to look for communities online where people share their feelings and experiences about their own decisions around surgery. Every trans person is going to have their own feelings on this, of course, and one person's experiences won't necessarily match your own, but I know that I've found it helpful, when thinking about my own surgical options, to talk to other people who've explored the same options to see how they feel about them.
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Re: Bottom Surgery confliction?
I'll admit I don't know much about the topic, but when I was looking through bottom surgery stuff I found that there's a procedure that will give you a vagina while keeping your penis, it's very creatively called penile-preserving vaginoplasty. I think that that uses scrotal tissue but I'm not a doctor, that's something you should ask them. I also don't know how common the procedure is or how many doctors perform it, so that is something you might want to consider. I wish I could help more but I'm afraid I don't know much about the topic.
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