General Questions
-
- not a newbie
- Posts: 97
- Joined: Tue Dec 15, 2020 7:22 am
- Age: 19
- Awesomeness Quotient: I have a pretty good sense of humor
- Primary language: English
- Pronouns: He/Him
- Sexual identity: Pan, mostly
- Location: Epping, NH
General Questions
So, me and my friend have recently agreed on a friend's with benefits relationship. We are just going to sext until Covid is over, but after that, were hoping to go all out. I'm a virgin and I know nothing about much of this, could you answer a few if my questions? I know you cant give me a perfect answer that will fit all scenarios, but could you tell me what is likely or common?
1. What should I expect? What's it going to be like when we start? What's it gonna be like while we're doing it? What about after?
2. Is it even legal for two people under the age of 16 to have sex? I think I live in a Romeo and Juliet state. I looked that up and it says I can do anything short of penetration. What exactly does that mean? Can I just not put my penis into her vagina? What if I want to?
3. If she comes before I do, will she want to keep going?
4. She said, and I quote, "if we do vanilla, I'll vomit. at least grab my hair." What does that mean?
I'm sorry if this is offensive in any way, I'm just really confused and I want this to go well whenever it happens
1. What should I expect? What's it going to be like when we start? What's it gonna be like while we're doing it? What about after?
2. Is it even legal for two people under the age of 16 to have sex? I think I live in a Romeo and Juliet state. I looked that up and it says I can do anything short of penetration. What exactly does that mean? Can I just not put my penis into her vagina? What if I want to?
3. If she comes before I do, will she want to keep going?
4. She said, and I quote, "if we do vanilla, I'll vomit. at least grab my hair." What does that mean?
I'm sorry if this is offensive in any way, I'm just really confused and I want this to go well whenever it happens
I hate the word homophobia. It's not a phobia. You're not scared. You're an asshole.
~Morgan Freeman
~Morgan Freeman
-
- previous staff/volunteer
- Posts: 10320
- Joined: Mon Jul 28, 2014 9:06 am
- Age: 33
- Awesomeness Quotient: I raise carnivorous plants
- Primary language: english
- Pronouns: she/her
- Sexual identity: queer
- Location: Coast
Re: General Questions
Hi idk anymore,
In terms of how to navigate a friends with benefits or other casual relationship, this article is a great place to start: Casual...Cool? Making Choices About Casual Sex. If you want a general overview of what to expect from first-time intercourse, this can help you out: First Intercourse 101.
In terms of legality, that all depends on the laws in your state. Heather has a really good breakdown of what those laws often include or exclude, and how to interpret the language in them: https://www.scarleteen.com/article/abus ... at_exactly
As for questions three and four, those are actually things to as her for clarification about. Especially if you're not sure what she means by not wanting "vanilla" sex; terms like "vanilla" and "kinky" can mean so many different things depending on the person that it's helpful to clarify what a partner is including in those definitions so everyone is on the same page.
In terms of how to navigate a friends with benefits or other casual relationship, this article is a great place to start: Casual...Cool? Making Choices About Casual Sex. If you want a general overview of what to expect from first-time intercourse, this can help you out: First Intercourse 101.
In terms of legality, that all depends on the laws in your state. Heather has a really good breakdown of what those laws often include or exclude, and how to interpret the language in them: https://www.scarleteen.com/article/abus ... at_exactly
As for questions three and four, those are actually things to as her for clarification about. Especially if you're not sure what she means by not wanting "vanilla" sex; terms like "vanilla" and "kinky" can mean so many different things depending on the person that it's helpful to clarify what a partner is including in those definitions so everyone is on the same page.
And you to whom adversity has dealt the final blow/with smiling bastards lying to you everywhere you go/turn to and put out all your strength of arm and heart and brain/and like the Mary Ellen Carter rise again.
-
- not a newbie
- Posts: 97
- Joined: Tue Dec 15, 2020 7:22 am
- Age: 19
- Awesomeness Quotient: I have a pretty good sense of humor
- Primary language: English
- Pronouns: He/Him
- Sexual identity: Pan, mostly
- Location: Epping, NH
Re: General Questions
Thanks!
I hate the word homophobia. It's not a phobia. You're not scared. You're an asshole.
~Morgan Freeman
~Morgan Freeman
-
- previous staff/volunteer
- Posts: 10320
- Joined: Mon Jul 28, 2014 9:06 am
- Age: 33
- Awesomeness Quotient: I raise carnivorous plants
- Primary language: english
- Pronouns: she/her
- Sexual identity: queer
- Location: Coast
Re: General Questions
You're welcome!
And you to whom adversity has dealt the final blow/with smiling bastards lying to you everywhere you go/turn to and put out all your strength of arm and heart and brain/and like the Mary Ellen Carter rise again.
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