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Masterbation

Questions and discussion about your sexual lives, choices, activities, ideas and experiences.
abcdefj
newbie
Posts: 1
Joined: Sun Nov 07, 2021 8:36 pm
Age: 19
Awesomeness Quotient: im the best ahahah
Primary language: english
Pronouns: he/they
Sexual identity: bisexual
Location: wtf

Masterbation

Unread post by abcdefj »

So….
basically what’s going on is that it’s just not doing it anymore
like- yeah it feels good and yeah i wanna do it quite often haha but like- there’s no satisfaction.
orgasms don’t feel as good and i don’t sit in a happy glow afterwards like i used to.
This could be because (as a trans man) i feel a bit disconnected to my body and don’t really find myself attractive in any way. it could also be because i’m doing it so often.

like i tried masterbating because i couldn’t get to sleep and thought it would tire me out but i’m just as awake as before.

Another bad thing to admit is that like - quite often- i masterbate like 4 times a day with multiple orgasms in each one and that’s apparently still not enough

and i’m definitely aroused when doing it- it’s like i’m turned on all the time and nothing can help it.

could it be that i just need to have sex with a person irl or invest in some toys?? idk 🤷
Sam W
previous staff/volunteer
Posts: 10320
Joined: Mon Jul 28, 2014 9:06 am
Age: 33
Awesomeness Quotient: I raise carnivorous plants
Primary language: english
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: queer
Location: Coast

Re: Masterbation

Unread post by Sam W »

Hi abcdefj,

Both the reasons you mentioned for why masturbation might not feel as great anymore sound very plausible to me. Sometimes we can get stuck in a rut when masturbating, which decreases the novelty of it and basically means we get bored in the process. And things like dysphoria or otherwise feeling disconnected from our bodies can lessen the enjoyment too.

Do you think taking a break from masturbating, or even just cutting down the number of times you do it per week, is something that you could try? That may help introduce some of the novelty back into it. Too, how engaged is your mind when you're masturbating ? Is it as turned on as your body is? Or is it bored or wandering much of the time?
And you to whom adversity has dealt the final blow/with smiling bastards lying to you everywhere you go/turn to and put out all your strength of arm and heart and brain/and like the Mary Ellen Carter rise again.
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