Masturbation

[masu]

So i have tried masturbating and i am virgin. My boyfriend has fingered me once and it felt good but when i tried masturbating i didn't feel anything. I am turned on before i start masturbating but the moment i try masturbating i am not turned on anymore.
I tried different speed but i don't feel anything.

[Siân]

Hi Masu,

When you say you've tried masturbating, have you been trying a specific thing or just seeing what feels good?

A lot of people think that there is a "right" way to masturbate, and then just do that and wonder why it isn't really doing that much for them. Really though, masturbating is just about connecting with your body and doing things that feel good! What do you think of trying to pay attention to what different sensations feel like for you and acting based on what feels pleasurable, without a specific goal in mind?

[masu]

I am new at this so i dont know much. I have tried fingering a few times but in the end it doesnt feel good and i dont know what to do like what else to do so i get frustrated and give up.
After my boyfriend fingered me i got curious about how would orgasm feel so my main goal was to get orgasm but i realised that i dont feel anything when i do fingering

[masu]

I have just tried fingering as i dont exactly know what else to do.
I want to explore and get to know my body more but i dont know how to or what to do for that.

[Sam W]

Hi Masu,

Since masturbation is fairly new to you, I think you'll get a lot of use out of these two articles, both in terms of the ways people masturbate and how the different parts of our bodies can be involved in pleasure: Going Solo: The Basics of Masturbation, With Pleasure: A View of Whole Sexual Anatomy for Every Body.

Too, when you masturbate, is your brain super involved in something like a fantasy? Or do you feel kind of bored or not aroused? I ask because our brains play a big role in pleasure and when they're not engaged, or when you're putting pressure on yourself to reach orgasm, that can really remove the pleasure from situation.

[masu]

Thank you sooo much for suggesting these articles and the answer to your latter question is that i am not really sure, like i am somewhere in between i guess, i dont know

[Sam W]

You're very welcome! As for what kind of brain space you're in, this article has some really good suggestions for how to create a space where you're very aroused and into what's going on, which can really increase how much you enjoy masturbation: How to Approach Sexual Fantasy and Desire on Your Own Terms