Birthday Gifts?!

[Kela]

Hi guys

soo just an update...things are going pretty well for me atm, im in regular person to person counselling and...I found someone!! and we are in an official relationship now things are truly amazing, not least because im finally recovering from all that's gone on over the past two years.

Anyhow...its his birthday soon, and I am at a loss as to what to buy him?? I want to make it special, y'know, the first birthday since weve been together, buuut im just not sure what to get him??!

has anyone got any cool/different ideas for birthday presents?

[Heather]

I am SO glad to hear you were finally able to start regular counseling. That's just wonderful, Kela.

You know, if you're asking me, I'd say since this is obviously still very new (and we know that you've had a pattern that hasn't been good for you about jumping in super-fast and deep with romances), not to go overboard with a gift. I'd suggest just picking something modest and simple based on what you know about him and what he likes in the world so far.

[Kaizen]

Adding to that, a gift can be special without being huge or expensive!

For example, my dad loves Hershey's kisses. For their first Christmas together, when they'd been dating for three months, my mom gave him a bag of them.
Or is there some school/office supply you know he likes or uses a lot of? My boyfriend's decided to be my "official" supplier of my favorite type of pen, and for part of his Christmas present I gave him a bag of mechanical pencils, since he asked to have one of mine earlier in the year.
A small gift card can be great too. Gift cards have a reputation for being generic but I think they become really personal if you specify what you thought they could use it for, like (Starbucks) "This is so you can try that hazelnut drink you said you want to try." (Amazon) "This is for you to put towards that computer part you want to buy." (App Store/Play Store) "You know how you keep saying you'd like to have [insert game/app you have to pay for] but you just don't want to spend the money? This is me buying it for you, and a little extra left over."

I always think useful presents are the best, anyway! They show you really pay attention to the person, and are something that actively helps that person out.

[Keda]

Those are great ideas! There's also always the option of not buying a present, but doing something nice for the person - offering to cook them dinner, for example, or setting aside some time to watch their favourite film(s) and eat popcorn. Or, if you have the cash, taking them out somewhere they'd like but don't normally go to. Experiences are just as good as stuff.

[Kela]

thanks for the suggestions guys!!

you're right, I haven't known him very long at all, soo I'm still learning what he likes and doesn't like. I guess I feel a bit pressured because he's now bought me three gifts 'just because', and I haven't bought him anything yet!! I just don't want him to think I don't care as much as he does or something I might bake him a cake for his birthday..? I'm not bad at cooking haha I've already offered to cook for him and I think he's keen for that, so that's always an option. He works in a office, would a tie be an acceptable gift...? I don't want things to be too formal, and obviously valentines day is only a few days later, so I want to do something nice for that aswell!!

[Keda]

The first thing I would say is, don't worry about gifts as a symbol of commitment. They're not! Some people (me!) love giving gifts and do it all the time, some people (my partner!) find it really hard and generally stick to low-key stuff, and it's all good. You show you care through the stuff you say and do together, not through the stuff you buy each other. So even if you decide "no gift this time", there's nothing wrong with that!

Baking a cake sounds like a great idea. I made my own birthday cake for the first time last year, it was a lot of fun and plus, yummy cake!