am I pregnant or not?

abii · Unread post by **abii** » Wed Jul 12, 2023 10:42 pm

I had "sex" and why I said that is because the penis went in half way and not much in at all. He never ejaculated but I'm not sure if he pre-cummed either. I have never gotten my period before so I'm really scared I might be pregnant. I'm hoping to get my period so I know I'm not pregnant since I can't really buy a pregnancy test. The "sex" was unprotected and lasted about 10 minutes and I didn't get an orgasm or anything. I also haven't been experiencing any early symptoms of pregnancy only tender breasts and bloating. I'm not sure but I get a few symtomps . Since pms symptoms are very similar to pregnancy, I don't know if I'm pregnant or about to get my first period. Please help, I don't want to be a pregnant 13 year old.

Nicole · Unread post by **Nicole** » Thu Jul 13, 2023 6:31 am

Hi abii,

Thanks for reaching out and welcome to the boards!

To start, I want to let you know that there is always a risk of pregnancy if you have unprotected sex, even if the penis was not inserted fully. Even if he did not ejaculate, the risk of pre-cum being present is still there and may cause pregnancy. You can read more about pre-cum here and its risks involving pregnancy: Pre-ejaculate, could I be pregnant?

This article mentions that "If you DID have unprotected penis-in-vagina intercourse but the man DID NOT ejaculate, then you have a LOW TO MODERATE risk of pregnancy. If it has been less than 120 hours since your risk, you may obtain emergency contraception. If it has been greater than 10 days since your risk, see your health care provider as soon as possible for a pregnancy test and an STI screening."

With this all in mind, there is also a chance of pregnancy even if you have never gotten your period. You can read more about this here: Do you have to have your period first in order to get pregnant? This article also goes into detail about contracting STIs, birth control options before or after having sex, and entering sexual relationships at a young age in general. I really recommend that you take a look!

After getting all of this information, I have a few questions, how recent was this? There may be time to look into purchasing emergency contraception (Plan B) just in case. Do you need any information on going about this? Also, do you need any information on condoms and proper condom use? In general, how are you doing right now?

I hope any of these resources help in any way. Please let me know if you have any further questions.

abii · Unread post by **abii** » Thu Jul 13, 2023 8:59 am

It wasn't recently, It has been 2 months now. I'm not sure how to contact a health care provider for a pregnancy test and an STI screening. Plus won't it be embarrassing to take an STI screening? Or to explain to your parents why? I haven't been experiencing any early pregnancy symptoms or pregnancy symptoms in general, the only symptom I have in common for pregnancy is bloating, tender breasts, and maybe frequent urination. But I have frequent urination because I drink a ton of water daily. So I'm just not sure if I'm about to get my first period by having PMS symptoms more or I'm pregnant. Is there an age limit to buy a pregnancy test or is it illegal to buy one when 13. Do I need a form or any prescription to buy one? After 2 months should I be aware of being positive in pregnancy, my stomach Isn't big or anything though.

Unread post by **Sam W** » Thu Jul 13, 2023 10:13 am

Hi abii,

So, if you're in the U.S there isn't an age you have to be in order to buy a pregnancy test, and you don't need a prescription to buy one. You can find them at any drug store or grocery store. If cost is a concern, can your partner help you get one or pay for one? When it comes to STI's, did you and your partner talk at all about your and his sexual history, like whether you or he have been sexual with another person in the past?

Too, since it sounds like you really don't want to be pregnant any time soon, if you haven't already done so I would talk with him about slowing way, way down when it comes to sexual activity. Is that a conversation you feel comfortable having?

abii · Unread post by **abii** » Thu Jul 13, 2023 12:31 pm

Well I'm in Canada right now and I still don't know if its illegal to buy a pregnancy test at age 13 or if you need a prescription to buy one. No I and my "partner" don't talk about our sexual history and he's never had sex before so he was a virgin before and I was too. No I don't feel comfortable talking about sexual activity, I honestly just want to know if I'm pregnant or not. Also am I supposed to be noticing signs and experiencing symptoms of early pregnancy? Because I'm not noticing any which I'm not noticing except bloating and tender breasts that I'm very glad I'm not noticing. But I also want to get my first period so I KNOW I'm not pregnant I just really want to know if I am or not.

abii · Unread post by **abii** » Thu Jul 13, 2023 7:33 pm

I'd Like to add some more. Whenever I eat I feel bloated all the time in my upper abdomen and sometimes both upper and lower. Then a couple of hours it goes back to being flat as it normally is or the next day it does. And my breasts can become sensitive on and off but not usually. It's always tender though. As I just remembered I had "sex" actually THREE months ago and not 2 months ago. It was between the ending of April and the starting of May in 2023, somewhere of that time but I don't remember exactly. Also can I still be pregnant without experiencing the other symptoms apart from bloating and tender breasts? One more thing, after I'm bloated in my upper abdomen it goes to my lower abdomen making my lower abdomen look swollen in the belly button part.

Unread post by **Sam W** » Fri Jul 14, 2023 6:51 am

So, I'm not finding anything to suggest that it would be illegal for you to purchase a test. And the reason I keep coming back to that is that the only way to be certain whether or not you're pregnant is to take a test. Symptoms can certainly clue you in, but as you can see here many of the symptoms of early pregnancy can easily be symptoms of something else, so there's no way for me, or you, to know from those alone whether you're pregnant: Chicken Soup for the Pregnancy Symptom Freakout's Soul

I will say that if you have never had a period before, and still haven't had one, that that suggests an egg wasn't present to be fertilized into a pregnancy when this incident occurred. It is technically possible that you were ovulating when this happened, that became a pregnancy, and thus your first period never arrived even though your first ovulation had happened. But, to me, the timing of all this suggests pregnancy was even less likely in this scenario than the already low risk posed by possible contact with pre-ejaculate.

All that being said, if you don't feel comfortable talking to the other person about the sexual activity you will or won't be engaging in, that in and of itself is a sign to stop any sexual activity until you do feel ready and comfortable to do those things. And if this is a scenario where you don't feel safe having that conversation, that's a whole other issue that we'd be happy to talk with you about.

abii · Unread post by **abii** » Fri Jul 14, 2023 9:06 am

Firstly at April and May when I had "sex" I didn't experience any symptoms of getting my period or anything so I probably wasn't going to get my period. My biological mom said she got hers when she was 15 or 14 because she couldn't remember exactly when, and I'm 13 right now. But now that I've been doing more research, I have found out that PMS and "about to have your first period" symptoms are MOSTLY or ALL the same, and you CAN'T tell the difference of weather your pregnant or about to get your first period. So that's why I'm so confused either I'm pregnant or actually about to get my period. Also I'm very likely sure he did not pre-ejaculate either after I did more thinking. It only took 10 minutes, and there wasn't any orgasms' or anything. When he pulled out he did ejaculate but he didn't pull out RIGHT after he ejaculated. He pulled out, backed away from me and ejaculated some else where. So the tip was dry after he pulled out. Since I have very very low chances, do you think I could be getting my first period since I'm close to the age where my mom got it? Plus not everyone gets their period exactly when their moms got it. Anyways I will still try to see if I could purchase a pregnancy test.

Nicole · Unread post by **Nicole** » Fri Jul 14, 2023 9:16 am

Hi abii,

Here is some information on pre-ejaculate from the article I linked in my first response to you:

"Pre-ejaculate can contain sperm, and it's something that (especially during penetrative activities) usually goes unnoticed by both partners. The vagina is a wet environment, so you are not going to be able to feel the addition of some extra fluid. And (no matter what a partner may claim) men generally do not feel pre-ejaculate when it happens (they may feel the wetness later, but there is no sensation associated with it actually coming out of the penis) nor are they going to be able to notice it during penetrative activities where (again) things are already lubricated. Pre-ejaculate can occur throughout the course of any erection, so it is always safe to assume that it is present. Also, many men (especially younger men) may not be able to "pull out" before ejaculation actually starts (even if they think they managed to withdrawal, they actually may not have)."

With that being said, there's no telling if he did pre-ejaculate or not.

So, I think the best move here is to purchase a pregnancy test. That is the only way to know if you are pregnant or not. As for getting your first period, it could be possible, but the only way you'll know if you're getting your first period or experiencing pregnancy is either if you get your period or if you take a pregnancy test. That's my best advice here!

abii · Unread post by **abii** » Fri Jul 14, 2023 11:23 am

Thank you very much, that made a lot of sense and that's what I'll be doing. I guess I will try and purchase a pregnancy test at Shoppers Drug Mart to see if I'm pregnant or not. I have a question, if your pregnant can you feel the babies heartbeat? If its been 3 months after sex do you need to experience pregnancy symptoms? If you don't experience pregnancy symptoms does it mean your not pregnant? If you get your period 3 months after having sex does it mean your pregnant or you're getting implantation bleeding and still pregnant

Unread post by **Sam W** » Fri Jul 14, 2023 11:40 am

So, early on in a pregnancy you cannot feel the heartbeat of the fetus. As for what symptoms you might experience, you can look at the summary in this article for a sense of what's most common:https://www.scarleteen.com/article/bodi ... ic_edition. If you do get your period soon, then yes, that would mean you are not pregnant; implantation bleeding, when it happens (because not everyone experiences it) happens when the zygote implants into the wall of the uterus, which would have happened months ago.

All that being said, a pregnancy test is still the way to go to get your for sure answer. Too, if it's tricky to get the test on your own, you could see if it's easier for him to be the one to get it (for instance, if one of you lives closer to the store than the other or has more cash on hand).

abii · Unread post by **abii** » Fri Jul 14, 2023 11:52 am

For the article I just read I do not have any of the symptoms except gas that's the only thing i have in common with the article. For the other articles I've read that I've found on google, it said spotting, tender or swollen breasts, bloating and frequent urination and more. Since I only 3 in common, firstly frequent urination is because I drink tons of water daily, and bloating and swollen breasts is because I'm still going through puberty. I read an article about puberty and getting your first period. I had like 4 things in common which was discharge, tender breasts, bloating and other like digesting issues.

So my question is " If I don't experience those signs and symptoms of pregnancy, does it mean I'm not pregnant?

Unread post by **Sam W** » Fri Jul 14, 2023 12:27 pm

If you don't have pregnancy symptoms, then odds are very good you're not pregnant. The tricky thing is that, because pregnancy symptoms can have some variation from person to person, someone might have very few of those symptoms in their first trimester.

Really, while I think the most likely answer is you're not pregnant, the reason we can't give you a definite answer is that we have to err on the side of caution. To me, the timing suggests there wasn't even an egg present to be fertilized, which means pregnancy wasn't a possibility. But if you need to be 100% certain of that, the test is the thing that can confirm it.

abii · Unread post by **abii** » Fri Jul 14, 2023 12:49 pm

Thanks a lot! That makes me feel a lot better now, I have made a plan that tomorrow I'm going to buy the test JUST to see if I am, I just wanted to be 100% certain if I am. Out of curiosity, can a pregnancy test say a false thing? So maybe it could have the 2 lines on it but you were never pregnant. About STD or STI, does it have any symptoms or signs that a person may have it? If so can you please tell me, I'm just afraid I might have it since it can lead to something worse in the future, especially if I don't know.

Unread post by **Latha** » Sat Jul 15, 2023 3:25 am

Hi abii,

I'm glad that makes you feel better, and that's a good plan!

It is possible for a pregnancy test to give a false result, but it is unlikely, especially if it is used properly. This guide has instructions on how to buy and use pregnancy tests, if you'd like: Peeing on a Stick: All About Pregnancy Tests

Some common symptoms of STIs are painful urination, pain in the abdomen, unusual discharge, and genital irritation, but many STIs don't cause noticeable symptoms, and for the ones that do, the signs may not show up for some time.

abii · Unread post by **abii** » Sat Jul 15, 2023 1:45 pm

Do I NEED to take the test? Because I don't have the chance to but I'll still see if I can though. I kinda want to wait a bit to see if I get any symptoms because I'm not getting any symptoms which I'm very glad about. Can you tell me how many weeks would it be to the second trimester? So like is it 13 weeks or something? Is it still possible to be pregnant if your stomach isn't big and your not experiencing any pregnancy symptoms? And since the symptoms that your about to get your first period and pregnancy are like the same, what is the difference so I know if I'm about to get my first period. Can you still tell me the signs and symptoms that I'm about to get my first period? I really just want to know. Thank you

Unread post by **Latha** » Sun Jul 16, 2023 4:21 am

Hello again, Abii!

As Sam said, if you don't have any symptoms it is very likely that you're not pregnant. The test is meant to give you a definite answer, and it's usually better to test sooner rather than later in case you need abortion care. Are you having trouble buying a test?

Yes, the first trimester is 13 weeks long, though that is meant to be counted from the first day of the last period.

Period symptoms and pregnancy symptoms can indeed be similar- to my knowledge, one thing that only happens during pregnancy is changes to the nipples. But there isn't really a reliable way to tell when exactly you will get your first period. If you've started experiencing other signs of puberty, like breast growth and hair growth under the arms and in the public region, it could be sometime soon- but soon can mean a year or so. You could ask your mother and other relatives when they got their period- it isn't exact, but it might give you a timeline.

If you'd like to prepare, I think it is useful to keep some pads in your bag and a change of clothes on hand at school, just in case.

abii · Unread post by **abii** » Sun Jul 16, 2023 1:16 pm

Thank you so much, and yes I am having trouble buying a pregnancy test. So since 13 weeks is 2 months and it HAS been THREE months for me that means its the "second trimester" because I don't know If I'm pregnant. My mom got her period at 15 or 14 and I'm 13 so I'm quite close. Also what do you mean my changes to the nipples? So does it gets bigger does the areolar glands get bigger and does the areolar get darker? I'm not sure exactly what you mean by that. I've gained more weight for some reason and I get bloated every single time I eat. That's a sign of both pregnancy and getting your first period. My discharge turns brown after a few hours for some reason but it doesn't come out brown, well it comes out a very very very light light brown. I'm not experiencing any fatigue or literally no symptoms.

Here are the symptoms I'm getting that's about "getting your first period" I went to a page, and its called wiki how the title was "How to Know When Your First Period Is Coming"
Here are the symptoms I have on the site or whatever:
-"You start to grow more pubic hair"
-"Your bloated or you have other digestive issues" I have constipation and gas too
-"Your breasts feel sore or heavy" and tender
-"You have a hard time falling asleep"
- "Your moody, anxious, or emotional" I'm feeling moody
-"You started puberty 2-3 years ago"

Those are the stuff I feel for " about to get your first period"
Now for pregnancy symptoms for second trimester and pregnancy signs:
- "You begin to show a larger abdomen" I don't know but I've gained weight
-"Skin changes, like darkening of the skin around your nipples, or patches of darker skin" I think its because of puberty but still I don't know
-"Frequent urination" Because I drink lots of water
-"Mood swings" Maybe because of puberty
-"Bloating" I don't know why I keep bloating

Thank you for reading all that. I have been experiencing signs of puberty like you mentioned, breasts growth, and pubic hair, and more. If you may give me some tips on how to get a pregnancy test that would be greatly appreciated because I am having trouble getting one

Unread post by **Amanda B** » Sun Jul 16, 2023 1:34 pm

Hi abii,

Can you let me know what barriers you are facing when it comes to buying the pregnancy test? If you are unable to afford the test, I'll reiterate my colleague's suggestion to ask the person you had sex with for assistance if this feels safe. You may also ask friends or family members for help, also only if this feels safe and available to you. If you are unable to physically get to the store, would you be comfortable purchasing a test online and having it delivered somewhere? If delivery to your residency feels unsafe, would you be able to get it delivered to a friend's house?

abii · Unread post by **abii** » Sun Jul 16, 2023 3:22 pm

Well it's ok, I am able to buy a test I just don't know what time and how to not let anyone know. I think I need about 5 more dollars. I don't feel comfortable going to the store and buying a pregnancy test. But do I really NEED to get a test though, can't I just wait to get my period to know if I'm not pregnant? Or is it not good to do that? Since I'm most likely not pregnant, since I'm not experiencing any pregnancy symptoms, can't I just wait till I notice some things and signs and stuff about pregnancy? Or is it too much of risk?

abii · Unread post by **abii** » Sun Jul 16, 2023 4:29 pm

Also, are those pregnancy quizzes on google true?

Unread post by **Sam W** » Mon Jul 17, 2023 7:00 am

So, it's ultimately up to you if you feel comfortable relying on the fact that you have yet to have your first period and engaged in a low risk activity in the first place to forgo getting a test. As I said before, the test is the way to be certain, and I do feel like there could be some benefit for you in having that result staring you in the face when it comes to removing anxiety around this.

What I am going to ask is that, if you choose not to get a test, we don't continue focusing our conversation here on whether the symptoms you do and don't have, or how much time has passed, or things like that. We've already given you the information we can around those, and rehashing them tends not to be productive after a certain point. If you have other questions, or want to talk about things like how to avoid similar situations in the future, that's absolutely something we can talk with you about.

And, no, pregnancy quizzes on the internet are often not reliable. I think it might help to give this resource a read when it comes to finding reliable information online: Legit or Unfit? Finding Safe, Sound Sex Educators & Support Online

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