wet dream

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heybulldog
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wet dream

Unread post by heybulldog »

hi
i suffer from ocd and this issue is bothering me
say i had a wet dream and i woke up and my shorts were wet
i then went and cleaned up a disposed of the shorts
a short while later sombody used the toilet could any missed sperm be transfered to cause pregnancy
the shorts never came into contact with anyone else but i did use the tap and toilet seat.
im really sorry for the ramble
Sam W
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Re: wet dream

Unread post by Sam W »

Hi heybulldog,

Before I answer, can I ask if there are two people using your account? In this post you mention producing sperm, but in an earlier post to us you mention having had a period.
And you to whom adversity has dealt the final blow/with smiling bastards lying to you everywhere you go/turn to and put out all your strength of arm and heart and brain/and like the Mary Ellen Carter rise again.
heybulldog
not a newbie
Posts: 11
Joined: Mon Jun 26, 2023 6:17 am
Pronouns: him
Location: uk

Re: wet dream

Unread post by heybulldog »

hi
im so sorry for the confusion
no its just me but when im in the middle of one of my anxiety attacks i try to seek assurances by seeking answers from both perspectives too try and calm myself down
im currently seeking help and i am on tablets
sorry again
Jacob
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Re: wet dream

Unread post by Jacob »

Hi heybulldog,

That is very much not cool behaviour. Lying about your experience to get different responses from us is very manipulative. Please remember that we are real people, who deserve a bit more honesty (who incedentally review previous posts whenever we reply ;)!)

Getting onto the anxiety part - reassurance seeking is a well recognised part of cyclical behaviours in anxiety disorders so if we engage in that with you and validate the idea that you can't answer the question on your own, we are not helping you are we?

We can offer support arround finding and getting the most out of treatment, and can even talk about the types of relationship issues that overlap with having a mental disorder, but we are not a source of treatment, or going to be a willing party to anxious reassurance cycles.

Going forward we'll need you to be 100% honest about who you are, and not use us for reassurance seeking or engage us in hypotheticals about pregnancy risks.

Do you think that's something you can do?
"In between two tall mountains there's a place they call lonesome.
Don't see why they call it lonesome.
I'm never lonesome when I go there." Connie Converse - Talkin' Like You
heybulldog
not a newbie
Posts: 11
Joined: Mon Jun 26, 2023 6:17 am
Pronouns: him
Location: uk

Re: wet dream

Unread post by heybulldog »

im so sorry for messing people around it was never my intention
ive found this site a massive help recently and thats why i turned to it for help.
im currently seeing someone for my ocd/anxiety issues but sometimes a thought appears and wont go away.
i know the answer to the questions but it helps when i see it written down so i can revert back to it when i need to
again im sorry it was a silly thing to do
Jacob
scarleteen staff/volunteer
Posts: 1189
Joined: Tue Jul 29, 2014 3:33 am
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Re: wet dream

Unread post by Jacob »

Thankyou for taking it seriously. I really appreciate it. I'll let the rest of the team know what we've agreed.

It's good to hear you're working with someone too! This might be a good thing to bring up with them, espcially the bit about wanting to see things written down.
"In between two tall mountains there's a place they call lonesome.
Don't see why they call it lonesome.
I'm never lonesome when I go there." Connie Converse - Talkin' Like You
heybulldog
not a newbie
Posts: 11
Joined: Mon Jun 26, 2023 6:17 am
Pronouns: him
Location: uk

Re: wet dream

Unread post by heybulldog »

hi
i havent been on here in a long time and since then ive been seeing a nurse and doing online therapy im also on tablets to help with my intrusive thoughts
these things have helped me a great deal
but all of a sudden recently after masturbating and cleaning everything up these silly thoughts about causing pregnancy have crept back in
im a male so its not so much a pregnancy scare its more a worry about the consequences if someone was to become pregnant from these actions
i know you cant offer any help for my issues but just a little reassurance that sperm left somewhere or accidentally touched by a female in the household wont be an issue
thanks for being there to let me get that off my chest
Sam W
previous staff/volunteer
Posts: 10320
Joined: Mon Jul 28, 2014 9:06 am
Age: 33
Awesomeness Quotient: I raise carnivorous plants
Primary language: english
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: queer
Location: Coast

Re: wet dream

Unread post by Sam W »

Hi heybulldog,

So, it sounds like some of this anxiety is related to you not having a good sense of just how fragile sperm are. Not only can they not survive outside the body all that long, they can't survive any kind of transfer, let alone the trip from penis to whatever object to someone's hand to a vagina.

As for this anxiety appearing again, it might help to talk with your therapist about whether there are things going on in your life that are causing you stress. When old anxieties, or anxieties we thought we'd dealt with, come back, that can sometimes indicate that there's something bigger going on in our lives that's causing us anxiety, and that anxiety is just latching on to various, unrelated things.
And you to whom adversity has dealt the final blow/with smiling bastards lying to you everywhere you go/turn to and put out all your strength of arm and heart and brain/and like the Mary Ellen Carter rise again.
heybulldog
not a newbie
Posts: 11
Joined: Mon Jun 26, 2023 6:17 am
Pronouns: him
Location: uk

Re: wet dream

Unread post by heybulldog »

thanks so much for the reply
i think your right about me over estimating the power of sperm
i know myself there was nothing visable there but my anxiety always makes me think of the one in a million chance!!
the joys of have intrusive thoughts/ocd 😔my other irrational thought is if there was some left over that someone could wipe it if they were ovulating!!
i know even writting it down sounds ridiculous but here i am.
thank you so much for the reply
i great to know someone is listning
Sam W
previous staff/volunteer
Posts: 10320
Joined: Mon Jul 28, 2014 9:06 am
Age: 33
Awesomeness Quotient: I raise carnivorous plants
Primary language: english
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: queer
Location: Coast

Re: wet dream

Unread post by Sam W »

You're very welcome! If you're finding that reading the answers here on the boards or on the main website isn't doing anything against those anxious thoughts, then I would bring that up in therapy the next time you can so you and your therapist can work out how to address them.
And you to whom adversity has dealt the final blow/with smiling bastards lying to you everywhere you go/turn to and put out all your strength of arm and heart and brain/and like the Mary Ellen Carter rise again.
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