Can’t orgasm :(

[meowcrumbs]

This is my first time using this website so I hope I’m doing this right, I’m sorry if I’m not.
I’ve been masturbating for about a year now, and no matter what I do I can’t orgasm. I’ve fingered myself (have gotten to three fingers), rubbed my clit with my fingers and with an electric toothbrush, but no matter what I do I can’t orgasm. It feels good but I either get too tired to continue, or it gets too sensitive and I have to stop. Sometimes I don’t feel anything at all when I masturbate, despite being horny and wet.

The closest I’ve gotten to an orgasm (I think) has been me sitting on my hand and grinding against it. And I get like mini orgasms when I do this? But I’m not sure if they’re orgasms cause they’re really tiny, but it’s the most pleasure I’ve felt while masturbating atleast. At first I thought this was because I was grinding against my clit, but I don’t feel the same pleasure when I rub my clit directly. This sucks because I wanna have a big orgasm and feel that release

[CaitlinEve]

Hey meowcrumbs!

I'm sure you're frustrated. Please know that you're not alone; plenty of people struggle to reach orgasm and there's no magic answer as to how to 'get there'. Over Scarleteen's years, we've touched on this subject a few times and you may find this article in particular helpful in understanding your experiences and what's going on behind-the-scenes of your body.

What I would recommend is to really focus on yourself and your body. It seems like you are focusing a lot on having a big orgasm, but it's possible that by fixating on getting that release you are causing yourself stress when you don't get it. What do you think about when you masturbate? Do you engage with your thoughts and fantasies, or are you getting bored because you're chasing a goal? Next time you masturbate, instead of focusing on the experience you've heard about, try to focus on yourself and get to know what makes you feel good. Orgasms look different for everybody and it's possible that your orgasms are just not what you expected (like the 'mini orgasms' you mentioned in your post).

Good luck, and feel free to ask more questions; that's what we're here for!