Don't feel anything when masturbating

[reidobviouslyy]

I don't feel anything when masturbating. I'm not asexual or anything, but I've been trying for two years and nothing. I can't find my clit so i can't try clitoral stimulation, I feel pleasure for a little bit when fingering but it goes away in less than a minute, and when fingering it's only with a certain technique (flicking up and down inside with my middle and ring finger) I am aroused when I try it so it's not that either. What can I do?

[KierC]

Hi there Reidobviouslyy, and welcome to the boards!

I’m sorry to hear that you’re not feeling much during masturbation — this can be frustrating to experience but I do have a few things I can recommend.

When you say you can’t find your clitoris, have you tried to find it with your fingers only, or have you been able to use a mirror to visualize a bit better? The anatomy of the clitoris can vary from person to person, where some people may have a smaller head of the clitoris, or a bigger, thicker clitoral hood, where it may make it a bit harder to feel the clitoris directly, and sometimes it can help to sit down with a mirror and explore a bit. We have a great article on this too, where you can learn more about your sexual anatomy! https://www.scarleteen.com/read/bodies/ ... s-and-more

There’s a few things that can make masturbation in general more pleasurable too, including lubrication, different positions, and exploring fantasies while masturbating. Too, exploring other erogenous zones in conjunction with vaginal entry may help extend that initial feeling of pleasure. Does that make sense?

We also have another article, a good introduction to masturbation: this may be helpful if only to illustrate that there are many ways to masturbate, and many erogenous zones to explore! https://www.scarleteen.com/read/sex-sex ... sturbation

[reidobviouslyy]

I have looked in the mirror but I can't seem to find it, and I read the articles embedded. I was wondering, since fingering seems to be the best method for me, how can I prolong the pleasure I feel from fingering?

[Sam W]

Hi reidobviouslyy,

When you compare what you see in the diagrams or photos of the external genitals against your own with a mirror, what does the region where the clitoris is look like? As Kier said , they can have the same variation in size and shape as the rest of our genitals, so what's likely happening is yours is more hooded, or on the smaller side, so it's harder to pinpoint.

I can't tell you exactly how to prolong pleasure when inserting your fingers, because what feels good to one body may feel underwhelming or plain old bad to another. What I can suggest is that you continue experimenting with things like different angles, depths, speeds, etc to see if there are ones that feel better for longer. Really, when we're working out what way(s) of masturbating feel best to us, exploration and experimentation are the way to go.

Too, can you give me a sense of what your mind is up to when you masturbate? Are you generally pretty engaged in a fantasy or piece of sexual media? Or tuned into the sensations you're experiencing? Or do you find your mind wandering or getting bored, or focusing mainly on whether or not this will be the time you last longer/find your clitoris/ etc ?