Ask Scarleteen Volunteer Orion Anything!

[Sofi]

Hi all, HAPPY PRIDE!!

I'm Sofi, a volunteer here at Scarleteen, and I'll be moderating a conversation with fellow volunteer Orion!
Orion (she/they) lives in the United States, is genderfluid and identifies as bisexual. They are passionate about accessible education and giving back to the community. Orion is 15 aka our youngest volunteer!

Orion, I think it's so cool that you're a volunteer with us at your age because you can relate very closely to a lot of our users. Do you feel that helps with your job here? Feel free to share anything you'd like about your experience as a queer teenager these days <3

[OrionRay]

As the youngest volunteer, I sometimes feel out of my depth, but I definitely feel like my age helps me to connect better with our users and generally understand their situations better. It's easy for me to empathize with our users because so many of them are so close to my own age, or the age of my peers. I also find it helpful because I know what sorts of things teenagers are doing and wondering these days, so I'm never out of ideas when it comes to things to write about.

As far as being a queer teenager in America, we've certainly come a long way! There's a GSA in my school, which would've been unfathomable just 30 years ago. So, I acknowledge my privilege as someone born in America in a fairly tolerable state. That said, it can be hard sometimes. My parents are far from tolerant, and I live in a relatively rural area with small, church-town values. Nowadays, homophobia shows itself most often in vitriolic language and verbal aggression, but I have been physically attacked before, as well as some of my friends. So, as it always has been- being queer is hard. But it's getting consistently better, and I have hope that that will continue into the future!

[Sofi]

Thanks for sharing - you're so right that things are easier today than they used to be, but that also doesn't mean it's EASY. You're a great asset to the Scarleteam, btw! <3

I know you've shared publicly you're a survivor of the foster care system, and are very trauma informed as a result. How was your experience being queer in the system? What are some words of encouragement you can share for others going through that too?

[OrionRay]

Being queer in the system is hard. I was lucky enough to not cycle through very many homes, but I was sexually victimized as a result of my sexuality. I suffered from a lot of internalized homophobia and shame.

As far as words of encouragement go, I'll say this; it's okay to keep it to yourself. I know that's the last thing anyone wants to hear, but really. In some situations it truly is not safe to be out, and that's okay. It doesn't make you any less queer or any less valid if you need to stay in the closet for your own protection. Don't put yourself in unecessary danger.

Also, another tidbit, remember that this isn't forever. One way or another you will get out, and once you do, you'll find your way. It's hard and it's winding and I know it's easy to give up, but trust yourself. You are strong enough to keep going, even if all that looks like is staying alive for another day.

[Sofi]

Thank you so much for sharing all this, you're so strong and brave <3 and your words will help many people.
I know you've talked about how your experiences have changed how you view sex, do you want to share any advice around trauma informed sex that could help someone in a similar situation?

[OrionRay]

Thank you!<3

My experiences have lead to a lot of shame and pain surrounding sex. It took a very long time to accept myself, and I'm still working on it now. Being trauma informed with sex is very important, because it's something that's easy to miss. The best advice I could give someone seeking knowledge on the subject varies based on why they are looking for the information. If you're trying to heal your own trauma related to sex, I'd suggest starting with reflective work. For me, journaling and therapy has worked great. Coming to terms with your own sexuality in a world where it's viewed as a taboo can be really hard, and the first step to healing is often being open and honest with yourself.

If you're looking to be sexually trauma informed for the sake of a partner, I'd suggest first talking to that partner. Questions like "What can I do for you" go a long way. With a topic such as this one, there truly is no one shoe fits all approach. Communication is the most important part, but it isn't always easy. I urge you to be patient and compassionate with your partner, and to treat these conversations sensitively.

[Sofi]

ProudAd2389 asked: "Hey Orion! I also think it's pretty cool that you're a volunteer with this org being 15! What made you interested in sharing resources on sex, sexuality, and sexual health? I'd also love to hear more about your passion for accessible education (especially if related to sex and sexual health!)"

Orion replied: "Hey! Thank you for the question . My interest in scarleteen was sparked by when my own friend found herself in need of it. She was in an unfortunate situation, and she came to me. I didn't have the answers, so I took to the internet, and came across Scarleteen. I referred her to their resources, and she ended up anonymously posting on their boards. Through their help she was able to get the help that she needed. I knew then that I wanted to help Scarleteen, so when I saw that they were looking for volunteers, I was quick to apply!

Besides just falling in love with the culture of Scarleteen, my passion for teaching people about things regarding sexuality and sexual health stem from my own anecdotal experiences. My parents are strongly Christian, and believe deeply in purity culture. Because of this, I learned everything I needed to know about my body from the internet. Even when I was younger I saw the injustice in this and I wanted to be part of the solution. I remember telling my peers about sexualities back in elementary school and receiving a lot of backlash, because it was considered inappropriate for me to mention that some people didn't want to marry the opposite sex. I was (and am) a vivacious child, so my teachers reprimands only spurred me further. Unfortunately, I took to the internet for the community I was looking for, and ended up in a lot of really unsavory situations. Now in hindsight, I see the value in accessible information and communication within communities even more.

My passion for accessible information specifically has a little less to do with sexual health in particular. That interest stems moreso from one of my other greatest passions- science. I love science, specifically biology, and I love to study it. I have since I was roughly ten. Unfortunately, reading about science is incredibly hard because of all the jargon. This pissed me off as a kid, but I didn't do anything about it- I just watched crash course. But now as I've grown up and I've seen how many other fields have fallen victim to this inaccessibility, and I've found myself wishing more and more that there were more digestible summaries of complicated subjects. I believe that everyone, regardless of their comprehension or background knowledge, should have access to the information they're seeking. So, Scarleteen allows me to help people understand things that are often very complex (like birth control and STDs) in the simplest ways possible.

Sorry this was so long winded! I love to yap, unfortunately. "

ProudAd2389 replied: "Love a long winded answer! Thanks for sharing your passions!"

[Sofi]

Sam asked: "Hi Orion!
I remember when you first introduced yourself to us, you talked about how much you love to write! Are there any things you're writing right now (they don't have to be Scarleteen related, to be clear) that you're open to talking about?"

[OrionRay]

Re: "Hi Orion!
I remember when you first introduced yourself to us, you talked about how much you love to write! Are there any things you're writing right now (they don't have to be Scarleteen related, to be clear) that you're open to talking about?"

Absolutely, thank you for asking!

As far as Scarlteen goes, I'm currently writing an article about over the counter birth control, which I'm very excited about.

Lately, I've been working full time, so I haven't had much time for personal writing projects. However when I find the time, I like to write poems just to keep my writing skills up to par!

[Sofi]

Re: "Absolutely, thank you for asking!

As far as Scarlteen goes, I'm currently writing an article about over the counter birth control, which I'm very excited about.

Lately, I've been working full time, so I haven't had much time for personal writing projects. However when I find the time, I like to write poems just to keep my writing skills up to par!

Sam replied: "Nice, it's great to have a way to keep writing even when you're swamped!

Okay, slightly related question: if you could write a book on any non-ficiton topic, what would it be about?"

[OrionRay]

Re: "Absolutely, thank you for asking!

As far as Scarlteen goes, I'm currently writing an article about over the counter birth control, which I'm very excited about.

Lately, I've been working full time, so I haven't had much time for personal writing projects. However when I find the time, I like to write poems just to keep my writing skills up to par!

Sam replied: "Nice, it's great to have a way to keep writing even when you're swamped!

Okay, slightly related question: if you could write a book on any non-ficiton topic, what would it be about?"

Assuming I had the ability, I would absolutely love to write a book about deconstructing purity culture. This is a topic I'm very passionate about, and I feel is relevant to society!

[Sofi]

Sam asked: "Okay, another question that I love asking folks: if you were a method of birth control, which would you be and why?"

[OrionRay]

Sam asked: "Okay, another question that I love asking folks: if you were a method of birth control, which would you be and why?"

Lol!!! This is hilarious. I'd say plan B, because I work best under pressure and am hated by extreme conservatives.