I can't cum

[Liliii]

Heyy I'm 19/F(about to be 19). I've tried masturbating but I can never cum. Like from penetration I don't really feel anything. But when I rub the clit it feels good but suddenly I want to stop like my horniness just goes away all of a sudden and I close whatever I'm watching. Also when my boyfriend was eating me out I didn't really feel anything. We tried to have sex too but I didn't feel anything we did it without the condom once cause I couldn't feel I could feel but it wasn't pleasurable. But ut kinda feels good when he does it with his finger but he gets tired and can't hold the same position.

[amber]

Hi Liliii and welcome to the boards!

As a culture we tend to put much more emphasis on orgasms than make sense for what they are. For some folks an orgasm will not be the metric of the 'end' or enjoyable sexual experience. I wonder if it would be helpful to focus on trying new things that bring you pleasure in the moment and less on reaching some 'end' goal.

I also want to point out that this feeling is very common both for our users and for folks in general. We have a few articles on our site that I believe may help you decenter orgasms and refocus on finding out what feels good to you!

How To Have Your First Orgasm: A Primer for Cisgender Women

Sexual Response & Orgasm: A Users Guide