i cant insert two fingers

[stevienicksfan]

I'm 17f and have relatively short nails. I can insert one finger pretty comfortably and it doesnt really feel like anything but if i try two fingers it starts to burn and if i try anything bigger (eg a hairbrush handle) it just hurts. I'm usually very wet when i try to insert my fingers but it feels like theres somethinf there i can like push on kind of that just isnt giving way. I'm worried its vaginismus or something similar and I'm worried it may affect my sexual relationships in the future. I've never had proper sex before and honestly i even struggle to put a tampon in but i havent tried in awhile. Is it worth going to a gynaecologist over?

[char]

Hi stevienicksfan, welcome to the boards!

It's important to pay attention to what your body tells you--if inserting more than one of your fingers (or another item that's larger) hurts, that likely means you need to change an aspect of your insertion. That can look like using water-based or silicone-based lube. (You can learn more about lube here: Lube 101: A Slick Little Primer). Sometimes, the lubrication from our own bodies alone may not be enough for insertion to feel just right, and that's completely normal. Have you been using lube whenever you're doing insertive sex? Another change you can do is to diversify the way you masturbate; instead of only relying on your figners, for example, you can add clitoral and/or nipple stimulation to the mix. There are lots of ways you can masturbate if insertion isn't currently working for you.

Additionally, there's also a possibility that the "something" you could push on during insertion is your cervix, which is the base of your uterus. You can check out our article about the vulva and vagina here: Innies & Outies: The Vagina, Clitoris, Uterus and More

Vaginismus is a psychosomatic condition, which means there's an underlying psychological factor that causes vaginal insertion. After reading this article about vaginismus, would you say any of the things mentioned here apply to you? If you've had some distressing experience related to sex and/or you were taught that sex is taboo/"sinful", you might want to talk to a gynecologist.

[stevienicksfan]

Hello! I do not typically use lube, I usually do not try to insert anything during masturbation, it was more of seeing if its a possibility. I've thought that maybe it could possibly be vaginismus before, but although I dont regularly use tampons I tried to get one in the other day and it was in but I kind of fucked up using the tampon and i couldnt get it out of the applicator so i had to pull it out dry and it was too sore to try again and I can insert one finger on its own anyway. My parents have never been taboo about sex abd I've never been sexually assaulted or anything so if it is that I'm just not sure where it could come from. Do you think its worth talking about with a doctor over? Thank you

[char]

Thanks for providing more context! It can be worth it to visit a doctor just to make sure that you don't have any particular medical condition, but it's also likely that your doctor might let you know that you probably need more lubrication (both from your own body and from store-bought lube) to make any insertion better. It's also important to relax whenever we insert anything--sometimes, when we think we're relaxed, that's not always the case.

As for tampons, I haven't personally used one (we don't really have tampons where I live, most menstruating folks use pads), but I do use a menstrual cup for my periods. When I tried using it for the first time, there was definitely a lot of trial and error--but after a while I eventually got it, also with the help of lube. While over time I I didn't need to use one to put it in, some people may continuously need it, and that's fine too.