Question?
Forum rules
This area of the boards is expressly for support and help for those who are currently in or have survived abuse or assault. It is also for those seeking information or discussion about abuse or assault. Please make every effort in this space to be supportive and sensitive. Posts in this area may or do describe abuse or assault explicitly.
This area of the boards is also not an area where those who are themselves abusing anyone or who have abused or assaulted someone may post about doing that or seek support. We are not qualified to provide that kind of help, and that also would make a space like this feel profoundly unsafe for those who are being or who have been abused. If you have both been abused and are abusing, we can only discuss harm done to you: we cannot discuss you yourself doing harm to others. If you are someone engaging in abuse who would like help, you can start by seeking out a mental healthcare provider.
This area of the boards is expressly for support and help for those who are currently in or have survived abuse or assault. It is also for those seeking information or discussion about abuse or assault. Please make every effort in this space to be supportive and sensitive. Posts in this area may or do describe abuse or assault explicitly.
This area of the boards is also not an area where those who are themselves abusing anyone or who have abused or assaulted someone may post about doing that or seek support. We are not qualified to provide that kind of help, and that also would make a space like this feel profoundly unsafe for those who are being or who have been abused. If you have both been abused and are abusing, we can only discuss harm done to you: we cannot discuss you yourself doing harm to others. If you are someone engaging in abuse who would like help, you can start by seeking out a mental healthcare provider.
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SilverFalcon92
- not a newbie
- Posts: 65
- Joined: Fri Apr 03, 2026 9:41 am
- Age: 20
- Awesomeness Quotient: I stay consistent even when I don’t feel like it.
- Primary language: English
- Pronouns: They/them
- Sexual identity: Bi curious
- Location: California
Question?
I remember watching this video of some woman saying that some man will fake their personality to have sex with you and I been seeing people in the comment sections saying that’s rape. I’m looking like that can’t be rape if 2 adults consent. I’m not over here defending people who do that I find that to be missed up and you should be yourself at the end of the day. Do you agree with the people saying that’s rape or not even when 2 adults consent to sex?
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KierC
- scarleteen staff/volunteer
- Posts: 858
- Joined: Tue Mar 12, 2024 2:10 pm
- Age: 29
- Awesomeness Quotient: I can and will reupholster anything
- Primary language: English
- Pronouns: She/they
- Sexual identity: Queer
- Location: Chicago, IL
Re: Question?
Hi!
This is a very interesting topic, and an important one because we’re talking about consent and honesty! I’m not sure what exactly the video you saw said so I can’t comment on that fully, but I can tell you a bit about this topic in general and what the current legal state of this is.
“Faking a personality” is an interesting term to me and to be quite honest, I’m not sure what it means. I’m not sure someone can “fake” a personality trait like funniness or kindness, because in the effort to “fake” it they would actually be being funny or kind. Know what I mean?
Faking actual truths about yourself that would make a potential partner unable to fully consent is of course morally corrupt and is an issue of consent. The term “rape by deception” refers to tricking someone into a sexual act where, if they had not been misled, they would not have consented. There is a history of prosecuting rape by deception in several countries including the US. For example, lying about STI status including when you’ve been tested exposed the other person to risks they weren’t aware of. In that case, their ability to consent is stripped because of the other person’s deception. Lying about the nature of the incident is also a form of deception (for example, saying that something is a medical procedure when it is not). Other forms of deception include lying about identity (for example, pretending to be a spouse or a partner), and lying about job status or social status.
There’s an article I’m reading about this that you might find answers your question more in-depth: https://yalelawandpolicy.org/solving-ri ... -deception
This is a very interesting topic, and an important one because we’re talking about consent and honesty! I’m not sure what exactly the video you saw said so I can’t comment on that fully, but I can tell you a bit about this topic in general and what the current legal state of this is.
“Faking a personality” is an interesting term to me and to be quite honest, I’m not sure what it means. I’m not sure someone can “fake” a personality trait like funniness or kindness, because in the effort to “fake” it they would actually be being funny or kind. Know what I mean?
Faking actual truths about yourself that would make a potential partner unable to fully consent is of course morally corrupt and is an issue of consent. The term “rape by deception” refers to tricking someone into a sexual act where, if they had not been misled, they would not have consented. There is a history of prosecuting rape by deception in several countries including the US. For example, lying about STI status including when you’ve been tested exposed the other person to risks they weren’t aware of. In that case, their ability to consent is stripped because of the other person’s deception. Lying about the nature of the incident is also a form of deception (for example, saying that something is a medical procedure when it is not). Other forms of deception include lying about identity (for example, pretending to be a spouse or a partner), and lying about job status or social status.
There’s an article I’m reading about this that you might find answers your question more in-depth: https://yalelawandpolicy.org/solving-ri ... -deception
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