Should I be watching porn?

[the_big_S]

I am 14 years of age and confused about whether watching porn is normal. Do other 14 year olds watch porn or not? Is it safe for me to watch it?

[mikky]

Hey there, welcome!

Can you start by reading this article: Making Sense of Sexual Media, and then letting us know what questions you have? I think an overview will be good.
What I can say is that many people do watch, read, write, look at, or otherwise engage with sexual media. Many people who are your age- around 14- might seek out sexual media because they are curious, find it interesting, are trying to answer questions they have about bodies and sex, find it sexy.... and so many other reasons.

Can you tell us more about what you mean by "safe"? Like are you worried about getting a computer virus, getting in trouble with your parents, hurting your body, developing unrealistic ideas about sex....?

I'll also drop two other articles here for you to read:
Looking, Lusting and Learning: A Straightforward Look at Pornography
Alpha Males, NoFap, and Other Myths About Sexuality and Sexual Media

[the_big_S]

Hi Mikky,

Thank you so much for responding. I will read the two articles later. What I mean by safe is, is it bad for my brain? I know my brain is developing, so will porn harm it?

[KierC]

Hey there!

No, watching porn is not bad for your brain. When people voice concerns about young people watching porn, those concerns are predominantly based in sex-negative ideologies (that sex is taboo/wrong, that young people don’t have sexualities or sexual lives, all of which we know to be untrue).

I think there’s also this idea that a “developing brain” must be a sheltered one. Which to me is a kinda silly thing because we know developing brains are super spongy, they can and do take in so much information and it’s good for your brain to do that! It just requires some extra care, context, and education to make sure you have all the information you need about what you’re seeing (it’s called “porn literacy,” or media literacy more generally). Porn won’t harm your brain, but without proper context and education it could set you up with unrealistic expectations of sex and bodies. Though, I’ll say, that can happen with folks of any age, so I wouldn’t say that’s just for developing brains. Know what I mean?

What’s most important here is not whether or not you watch porn, but maybe *how* you watch it and what you take from it. The articles Mikky sent are super helpful and will explain much more of this idea, so I’ll let you peruse those. Do take a look when you want, and let us know what you think!