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A rather odd thought regarding myself and lesbians

Questions and discussion about your sexual lives, choices, activities, ideas and experiences.
TheNiteHawk
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Awesomeness Quotient: My lust for knowledge will never be satisfied.
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Location: United States of America

A rather odd thought regarding myself and lesbians

Unread post by TheNiteHawk »

I have no idea where this would go (bodies, gender, etc.), so I decided to post it here. This may seem odd, but everyone here is very open-minded, so I figured I'd go ahead and share it.

To start off, I am a male heterosexual that is comfortable in my sexuality. I've never felt out of place in my body or anything like that. For some time now, I've been wondering what it would be like to be a lesbian. It's not a transgender thing, I don't feel as if I should be a woman or whatnot. It's more a curiosity thing, I suppose. As a man attracted to woman, I'm not sure why I'm wondering about it. Rather, I wonder often what it would like to be a woman attracted to and in a sexual relationship with another woman. Whether if it has anything to do with me being a heterosexual man and finding lesbians erotic, I don't know.

Although it's always been a wonder, not something I would fantasize about (as me being a lesbian). To make more sense of that, although I sometimes fantasize about lesbians, I'm not one of them, I'm sort of the.... omnipotent invisible observer? Imagine reading a book in the first-person view, but disconnecting yourself from the character, or having someone tell you a story from their point of view, not you becoming them.

I know this is a rather odd topic, so any input at all is welcome. If there's anything I can clear up or make more sense of (because I know this probably seems convoluted), feel free to ask!

TL;DR= Homosexual male, wondering what it would be like to be a lesbian.
Enemy to those who make him an enemy; friend to those who have no friends.
Heather
scarleteen founder & director
Posts: 9687
Joined: Sun Jul 27, 2014 11:43 am
Age: 54
Awesomeness Quotient: I have been a sex educator for over 25 years!
Primary language: english
Pronouns: they/them
Sexual identity: queery-queer-queer
Location: Chicago

Re: A rather odd thought regarding myself and lesbians

Unread post by Heather »

I don't know that I'd say it's a big whoop for anyone to feel curious about what it's like to be someone else, no matter what the "someone else" is all about.

I'd also say it's pretty common for heterosexual people to fantasize about a same-sex couple who are the gender of people they tend to be attracted to (thus the giant market for girl-girl porn made for men, and how many straight women love gay porn). (Your bottom bit says homosexual, but you started saying hetero, and your profile also lists hetero as your orientation, thus why I'm going with that here.)

In a word, not seeing anything odd here. Why do YOU think it's odd?
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead
TheNiteHawk
not a newbie
Posts: 72
Joined: Thu Aug 21, 2014 4:02 pm
Awesomeness Quotient: My lust for knowledge will never be satisfied.
Primary language: English
Pronouns: He/Him
Sexual identity: Heterosexual Male
Location: United States of America

Re: A rather odd thought regarding myself and lesbians

Unread post by TheNiteHawk »

Oops. I meant hetero. Must have wrote homo by accident.

I don't really know why I said odd. I couldn't really think of another word that I thought fit. I think it may have been due to the household I was raised in, which pushed abstinence and heavy disdain for same-sex couples (and people, for that matter). It was just something that occurred to me, that I sort of wondered what it was like. Perhaps, "what if I was President?" or "what if I was a CEO?". Sort of wondering what it would be like to be something you'll never be able to get to experience first-hand.
Enemy to those who make him an enemy; friend to those who have no friends.
Heather
scarleteen founder & director
Posts: 9687
Joined: Sun Jul 27, 2014 11:43 am
Age: 54
Awesomeness Quotient: I have been a sex educator for over 25 years!
Primary language: english
Pronouns: they/them
Sexual identity: queery-queer-queer
Location: Chicago

Re: A rather odd thought regarding myself and lesbians

Unread post by Heather »

I'd say that, if anything, people being MORE curious about things presented to them as deviant or off-limits is usually the way that stuff works. :)

But really, just because your family raised you a certain way doesn't mean you won't think about something or feel curious. For sure, some people can find certain messaging or the way it's given all but exterminates their creative thinking or curiosity, but hopefully, that isn't what happens. In other words, hooray that those messages clearly didn't keep your mind from being active and open, whatever it's thinking about.

Again, though, people wondering what it's like to be in someone else's shoes is pretty part and parcel of just being a living person with an active mind. Because in your case it's about wondering what it's like to be lesbian or a woman with a woman partner doesn't strike me as any different than "What if I was President?" essentially.
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead
TheNiteHawk
not a newbie
Posts: 72
Joined: Thu Aug 21, 2014 4:02 pm
Awesomeness Quotient: My lust for knowledge will never be satisfied.
Primary language: English
Pronouns: He/Him
Sexual identity: Heterosexual Male
Location: United States of America

Re: A rather odd thought regarding myself and lesbians

Unread post by TheNiteHawk »

Thanks Heather. You're certainly right in saying that my mind is active and open. As a matter of fact, I daresay it's more active and open than my parents'.

Regardless, I actually have no idea where I was going with the entire topic. I guess I just wanted to see what other people had to think about it. Anyway, thanks again! :)
Enemy to those who make him an enemy; friend to those who have no friends.
Heather
scarleteen founder & director
Posts: 9687
Joined: Sun Jul 27, 2014 11:43 am
Age: 54
Awesomeness Quotient: I have been a sex educator for over 25 years!
Primary language: english
Pronouns: they/them
Sexual identity: queery-queer-queer
Location: Chicago

Re: A rather odd thought regarding myself and lesbians

Unread post by Heather »

Sure thing!

How have you been overall, btw? We haven't seen you around in a bit. :)
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead
TheNiteHawk
not a newbie
Posts: 72
Joined: Thu Aug 21, 2014 4:02 pm
Awesomeness Quotient: My lust for knowledge will never be satisfied.
Primary language: English
Pronouns: He/Him
Sexual identity: Heterosexual Male
Location: United States of America

Re: A rather odd thought regarding myself and lesbians

Unread post by TheNiteHawk »

It has been awhile, hasn't it? I've been doing pretty well myself. Better now then the beginning of last year, that's for sure, so that's always a good thing. I'm glad for that.

Really though, it's been quiet on the homefront for the most part (I've always wanted to say that).
Enemy to those who make him an enemy; friend to those who have no friends.
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