Need some advice for my first time

[Iamie_28]

hi, im 18 this year and i am planning to lose my virginity by having my boyfriend finger me (and thats it, nothing more). we are planning to go to the movies and have sex while watching the movie. the position i plan is for him to sit down and i sit with my back to him, leaning on him. Is there a risk of pregnancy (we definitely won't penetrate or rub) but i am afraid that when we do that his vagina and penis will be exposed? do we need to put a cloth, pillow, towel,... or something similar between my back and his penis to be absolutely safe?

[Heather]

Hi there, lamie.

I'm not going to advise you have any kind of sex in a movie theater. I think that's a very bad idea for a handful of reasons (including that it's something you could get in big trouble for doing), but three of the biggest reasons I think this is a bad idea are that:
1) To be sexual with a partner, especially when we're new to it, and have it go well, we need to be able to openly communicate as we go. We can't do that in a place where no talking is allowed.
2) We need to be able to adjust things with any kind of sex for what feels good or our comfort. You can't do that in something as restricting as a movie seat.
3) This isn't consensual for the other people near you who may well see what you are doing. It's just not only to nonconsensually include people in our own sex.

How about you hold off on this or other kinds of sex until you two have a place to be sexual together that is actually private and allows you to at least be able to talk as you go?

[Iamie_28]

maybe you misunderstood, we just intend to rent a motel to watch movies privately there, not in a public place. now can you answer my question (sorry for my English is not very good)

[Heather]

That certainly is very different than going to the movies, like you said explicitly in your first post.

I still wouldn't suggest trying to watch a movie and do something new to you sexually for the first time, though. Sex with partners is something we really need to be giving our full attention to, especially with a new partner or a sexual activity no one has done together before. You need to be able to communicate, and a movie in the background will likely get in the way of that.

I'm still not sure why, in this new scenario, your partner's penis will be involved, but pregnancy risks only exist when there is contact between a penis and your genitals. Since you are describing engaging in manual sex (fingering), and now aren't talking about sitting on top of him in a movie theater like you first were, that wouldn't involve any contact with your partner's penis, so no, it won't involve any pregnancy risks.

For more on which activities do and don't pose risks of pregnancy, STIs, or both, you can have a look at: https://www.scarleteen.com/read/can-i-g ... r-pass-sti