Scared abt vulvar cancer
-
Max3_3
- not a newbie
- Posts: 40
- Joined: Wed Aug 02, 2023 8:11 am
- Age: 19
- Primary language: English or italian
- Pronouns: She / they
- Location: Italy
Scared abt vulvar cancer
Hello, I'm back again with a new worry..
I'm 18 years old, I found on my labia minora (I'm pretty sure it's that) a lump (?) idk if it's actually that, but it's the size of a pea I guess..it hurts only to the touch or if I press on it. My mom said that it's probably just a pimple or something but there's no white from what I've seen so I don't think so? I'm really freaking out and thinking it's cancer.. I'm gonna try to get an appointment to a dermatologist to get it checked but idk how much I will have to wait. I just can't stop thinking
I'm 18 years old, I found on my labia minora (I'm pretty sure it's that) a lump (?) idk if it's actually that, but it's the size of a pea I guess..it hurts only to the touch or if I press on it. My mom said that it's probably just a pimple or something but there's no white from what I've seen so I don't think so? I'm really freaking out and thinking it's cancer.. I'm gonna try to get an appointment to a dermatologist to get it checked but idk how much I will have to wait. I just can't stop thinking
-
Latha
- scarleteen staff/volunteer
- Posts: 1211
- Joined: Sat May 22, 2021 8:13 am
- Age: 23
- Primary language: English
- Pronouns: she/her
- Sexual identity: Queer
- Location: India
Re: Scared abt vulvar cancer
Welcome back, Max! I’m glad you are here, though I’m sorry you are feeling so distressed. Visiting a doctor is a good idea, but since it might take some time to get an appointment, let’s see if we can think through this together.
I’ve heard of a saying that goes ‘When you hear hooves, look for horses before zebras’. That is to say, if you live in a place where horses are more common than zebras, it makes sense to think of the former when you hear the sound of hooves.
I think it can be helpful to apply this kind logic when we are worried about our health. I know cancer is scary, and I understand why you would feel the need to check for it, but it is also very rare compared to the many, many other reasons why someone might develop a bump on their labia. The most likely causes for this bump are also likely to be easy treatable, if they are even harmful at all. It might even go away on its own, before you get around to seeing a doctor. Bodies change all the time without causing serious problems. When you notice a change, try to rule out the most common causes before you start thinking about anything rarer. To put in plainly, you don’t have to worry about cancer, because you don’t have information that points to it right now. Does this make sense?
I realize this is all easier said than done. When you have trouble with anxiety, it can be difficult to get your mind to listen to reason. Have you ever sought out mental health support for these feelings? What has helped you when you’ve felt like this in the past?
I’ve heard of a saying that goes ‘When you hear hooves, look for horses before zebras’. That is to say, if you live in a place where horses are more common than zebras, it makes sense to think of the former when you hear the sound of hooves.
I think it can be helpful to apply this kind logic when we are worried about our health. I know cancer is scary, and I understand why you would feel the need to check for it, but it is also very rare compared to the many, many other reasons why someone might develop a bump on their labia. The most likely causes for this bump are also likely to be easy treatable, if they are even harmful at all. It might even go away on its own, before you get around to seeing a doctor. Bodies change all the time without causing serious problems. When you notice a change, try to rule out the most common causes before you start thinking about anything rarer. To put in plainly, you don’t have to worry about cancer, because you don’t have information that points to it right now. Does this make sense?
I realize this is all easier said than done. When you have trouble with anxiety, it can be difficult to get your mind to listen to reason. Have you ever sought out mental health support for these feelings? What has helped you when you’ve felt like this in the past?
-
Max3_3
- not a newbie
- Posts: 40
- Joined: Wed Aug 02, 2023 8:11 am
- Age: 19
- Primary language: English or italian
- Pronouns: She / they
- Location: Italy
Re: Scared abt vulvar cancer
Well I try to distract myself a lot but I have a really bad habit of Searching symptoms online so now I'm really scared it's gonna be cancer
luckily the appointment is in a few days but I'm also scared they're just gonna give me bad news,, I know that vulvar cancer is really rare at my age but it's hard to not worry
-
Latha
- scarleteen staff/volunteer
- Posts: 1211
- Joined: Sat May 22, 2021 8:13 am
- Age: 23
- Primary language: English
- Pronouns: she/her
- Sexual identity: Queer
- Location: India
Re: Scared abt vulvar cancer
Hi Max, well done on booking the appointment!
I understand the impulse to search for symptoms online, even when you know it isn’t always helpful. For some people, doing activities with others can be more engaging than trying to manage your feeling on your own. If searching online is making you worry, but you can’t help it sometimes, do you think it would help to reach out to another person? Also, our anxiety resources page has some links to self-help tools. Distraction is a good strategy, but it isn’t the only one. Would you look through the links and see if anything else helps?
(I’ll be heading out soon, so if I mess your response, the next person on shift should get to it.)
I understand the impulse to search for symptoms online, even when you know it isn’t always helpful. For some people, doing activities with others can be more engaging than trying to manage your feeling on your own. If searching online is making you worry, but you can’t help it sometimes, do you think it would help to reach out to another person? Also, our anxiety resources page has some links to self-help tools. Distraction is a good strategy, but it isn’t the only one. Would you look through the links and see if anything else helps?
(I’ll be heading out soon, so if I mess your response, the next person on shift should get to it.)
-
Max3_3
- not a newbie
- Posts: 40
- Joined: Wed Aug 02, 2023 8:11 am
- Age: 19
- Primary language: English or italian
- Pronouns: She / they
- Location: Italy
Re: Scared abt vulvar cancer
Thank you, I'll look into it
I also have a generalized anxiety disorder (diagnosed) so it is difficult for me to manage my anxiety and i wasn't really asking about that but I appreciate the help ! I'm mostly just really scared about cancer, because the lump I have feels really hard and it is painful to the touch so I'm just really scared it's gonna be that
-
Sofi
- scarleteen staff/volunteer
- Posts: 763
- Joined: Fri Sep 04, 2020 2:23 pm
- Awesomeness Quotient: I make my own nail art!
- Primary language: Spanish or English
- Pronouns: she/they
- Sexual identity: Queer
- Location: USA
Re: Scared abt vulvar cancer
Hi Max3_3, I hear you on having generalized anxiety disorder and it being hard to manage anxiety on your own. Still, it is possible, and worth trying. Did you find any of the resources on the page helpful? Truly, worrying before seeing a doctor is just creating anxiety. As you said yourself, it's very rare, so trying to just keep the anxiety around it as low as possible for the next few days until the appointment is the best you can do for yourself. <3
-
Max3_3
- not a newbie
- Posts: 40
- Joined: Wed Aug 02, 2023 8:11 am
- Age: 19
- Primary language: English or italian
- Pronouns: She / they
- Location: Italy
Re: Scared abt vulvar cancer
I did look into it and I'm trying my best to stay calm, but it's just so hard. I can't seem to shake my mind off the possibility of it being cancer. I know it is rare, but I'm already an unlucky person so now I fully convinced myself I have vulvar cancer
I even think the lump is getting bigger but I'm not sure..I'm just so scared,, I'm sorry if I seem silly 
-
Latha
- scarleteen staff/volunteer
- Posts: 1211
- Joined: Sat May 22, 2021 8:13 am
- Age: 23
- Primary language: English
- Pronouns: she/her
- Sexual identity: Queer
- Location: India
Re: Scared abt vulvar cancer
Hi Max,
While I still think it is very likely that this isn’t a symptom of cancer, I don’t think you are silly at all. I can see that you are trying your best — it is just that you struggle with an anxiety disorder. We do have to try to think well when we are anxious, but often enough, that doesn’t solve everything. Have you ever spoken to a mental health clinician about these worries? We can talk to you, but they may be able to provide you with more support.
I’m curious, what makes you think of yourself as an unlucky person?
While I still think it is very likely that this isn’t a symptom of cancer, I don’t think you are silly at all. I can see that you are trying your best — it is just that you struggle with an anxiety disorder. We do have to try to think well when we are anxious, but often enough, that doesn’t solve everything. Have you ever spoken to a mental health clinician about these worries? We can talk to you, but they may be able to provide you with more support.
I’m curious, what makes you think of yourself as an unlucky person?
-
Max3_3
- not a newbie
- Posts: 40
- Joined: Wed Aug 02, 2023 8:11 am
- Age: 19
- Primary language: English or italian
- Pronouns: She / they
- Location: Italy
Re: Scared abt vulvar cancer
Well I do think I'm an unlucky person because of many things, also later (it's 4am here) I have an appointment with a dermatologist so I'll ask her what it is. I'm just really anxious that this is cancer (sorry for being annoying, I just can't shake my mind off of it at all despite trying to)
-
Heather
- scarleteen founder & director
- Posts: 10778
- Joined: Sun Jul 27, 2014 1:43 pm
- Age: 56
- Awesomeness Quotient: I have been a sex educator for nearly 30 years!
- Primary language: english
- Pronouns: they/them
- Sexual identity: queery-queer-queer
- Location: Chicago
Re: Scared abt vulvar cancer
I do want to add that sebaceous cysts -- and a couple other kinds -- of the vulva are very common and they are also almost always benign.
That said, you said you're having a hard time shaking this from your mind even when you try. Can I ask what your usual methods of trying to interrupt these kinds of disturbing thoughts are? Do they usually work for you?
That said, you said you're having a hard time shaking this from your mind even when you try. Can I ask what your usual methods of trying to interrupt these kinds of disturbing thoughts are? Do they usually work for you?
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead
-
Max3_3
- not a newbie
- Posts: 40
- Joined: Wed Aug 02, 2023 8:11 am
- Age: 19
- Primary language: English or italian
- Pronouns: She / they
- Location: Italy
Re: Scared abt vulvar cancer
I've been to the dermatologist and she told me that I probably got folliculitis because of the ovarian cyst that I have, which caused an hormonal imbalance. I need to take lots of meds and cream now, but I'm still a bit worried about the bump on my labia minora, since she checked mostly the pimples on my breast, but she checked the vulva too so I guess she saw it ? But apparently it's nothing too bad
-
Heather
- scarleteen founder & director
- Posts: 10778
- Joined: Sun Jul 27, 2014 1:43 pm
- Age: 56
- Awesomeness Quotient: I have been a sex educator for nearly 30 years!
- Primary language: english
- Pronouns: they/them
- Sexual identity: queery-queer-queer
- Location: Chicago
Re: Scared abt vulvar cancer
Did you not ask her about it?
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead
-
Max3_3
- not a newbie
- Posts: 40
- Joined: Wed Aug 02, 2023 8:11 am
- Age: 19
- Primary language: English or italian
- Pronouns: She / they
- Location: Italy
Re: Scared abt vulvar cancer
I did ! She checked and I went to read again the paper She gave me with all the info about what I have and it seems it's likely a cyst.
Today im also having breast, arm pit and neck pain, my back too a bit so I'm worried about that now
I can't catch a break. Apologies for being this anxious, thank you for replying
Today im also having breast, arm pit and neck pain, my back too a bit so I'm worried about that now
I can't catch a break. Apologies for being this anxious, thank you for replying
-
Sofi
- scarleteen staff/volunteer
- Posts: 763
- Joined: Fri Sep 04, 2020 2:23 pm
- Awesomeness Quotient: I make my own nail art!
- Primary language: Spanish or English
- Pronouns: she/they
- Sexual identity: Queer
- Location: USA
Re: Scared abt vulvar cancer
I just want to circle back to what Heather asked: "That said, you said you're having a hard time shaking this from your mind even when you try. Can I ask what your usual methods of trying to interrupt these kinds of disturbing thoughts are? Do they usually work for you?"
Since we're not medical professionals, and you're already seeing one (yay!), what we can help you with is managing the anxiety and thought spirals.
Since we're not medical professionals, and you're already seeing one (yay!), what we can help you with is managing the anxiety and thought spirals.
-
- Similar Topics
- Replies
- Views
- Last post