Not creaming when having an orgasm

[Nadia91]

Hi,
so when I touch my clit, I get shakey legs, faster breathing, tingling sensation round the clit, warmth in my upper body, and then the feeling becomes too much in the sense that I want to scream but can't because I'm in between the bedrooms, so I stop and then start again, and then again it gets too much so I stop, but then feel the contractions internally, and then either sleepy or happy or relaxed.

So that to me sounds like an orgasm?

The issue is I don't cream or squirt or anything, but at times sometimes feel myself drying up very quickly to the point that I need to use spit when though I'm still turned on.

I always see on social media about women getting wetter and cum on the hands, so am worried over why I'm not getting that?

[Heather]

So, no matter what kind of genitals people have, orgasm itself doesn't create ejaculation. Even for those with a penis, those are actually two separate things, though they frequently happen one right after the other.

For those with a vulva and vagina, ejaculation is less common, and again, will often not happen with orgasm. Ejaculation for people with vulvas and vaginas is a thing that happens for some people, but not others, and it also tends to be something that only happens with pretty specific activity, the kind that's not so easy to do alone unless you have some targeted toys.

Self-lubrication also is something that is separate from orgasm: that tends to be more linked to arousal, and yes, most people with vulvas and vaginas will use lubricants during masturbation and partnered sex, because even for folks who stay very turned on and who do self-lubricate a good deal, that often isn't enough all by itself, especially for sustained sexual activity. Too, depending on where you are in your fertility cycle also plays a part in how much fluid and discharge you experience at a given time.

Social media, like porn, is rarely a good place for accurate sex information. I don't know what exactly you've been reading when, but it sounds like you might be dealing with a combination of inaccurate information, overblown/exaggerated info, or just misunderstanding what someone means.

For sure, it sounds like you're experiencing orgasm. The fact that you aren't ejaculating or that your self-lubrication isn't ...well, more, or isn't increasing with orgasm doesn't mean you aren't having orgasms.

Does that clear that up for you?

[Nadia91]

Yes, thank you.
I also want to be able to experience a full body orgasm, so that all over tingling feeling rather than just the tingling down there.
Each time I feel like I'm going to get a strong orgasm, I get scared.
For example one time my whole body was shaking, usually the shaking stays with my legs, very rarely my hands, so I felt like I'll have the strongest orgasm yet, but it started to become too much, like my whole body was shaking and looked more like a seizure. I've never had one and don't have any health conditions, but I got scared so stopped. That fear came back the other night when I felt my inner thigh muscles contract which is new for me, but again I had a fear and stopped.

[Becky]

Hey Nadia!

What do you think is causing this sense of fear you have? Are you feeling scared because the sensation is overwhelming and you haven't experienced it before?

[Nadia91]

I fear it's something bad happening, like an actual seizure, like I'm at risk

[lilikoi]

If you've never had a seizure and don't have any serious health conditions or other seizure symptoms outside of instances of sexual arousal, my guess is that you are misinterpreting what is happening.

Muscle contraction is a symptom of many body experiences. If you experience involuntary muscle contractions, it should not be an automatic concern. For instance, sometimes our hair stands on end when we are cold. That is involuntary. It also happens when we are experiencing inspiration or when we get scared. That is an involuntary contraction of your tiny muscles in your follicle. No cause for alarm! Contraction in the muscles of your thigh and body is a common body response to orgasm. You might even notice your hair standing on end!

If you want to experiment, you could try stopping the stimulation for a bit when you feel scared about your thigh contracting and then gently or slowly continue to get used to the sensations. Does that sound like something you would feel comfortable with?

[Nadia91]

I understand it's a common reaction, but because it felt severe, like my head was moving off the bed I felt alarmed.

I can try getting used to the sensations.

[amber]

I agree with lilikoi here!

Full body muscle contractions are very common with orgasms and may be more noticeable to you sometimes and not so much other times. Instead of 'getting used to the sensations' I wonder if it would be helpful to think of these feelings throughout your body how you do the contractions in your genitals. Orgasms are full body experiences, most importantly including your brain!

Was there anything else you were hoping to chat about ?