My girlfriend and I incorporated a dildo into our sex life and I’m feeling conflicted about it

[Booper]

We’ve been together for 9 months and about 3 weeks ago we decided to buy a 6” dildo as well as some other sex toys because they went on sale. This dildo is significantly larger than my penis about 1.5” longer and about an 1” thicker. I’ve never been overly concerned about penis size as far as I know I’m about average or maybe slightly under.

Since we’ve bought it we’ve used it a few times, and safe to say my girlfriend loves it. It makes her cum from penetration and multiple times she has described it as big, both of which she has never done with my penis. At first I was feeling a little jealous and worried but honestly my girlfriend is so loving and kind that it makes it hard for me to stay that way. It also helps that she makes it very clear she still likes my penis and that the dildo is just part of our sex life occasionally.

As time has gone on I’ve grown to kind of like the size comparison (most of which is internal, she has not made any statements that outright compare me to it). I find it almost thrilling to feel smaller than the dildo and be told by my otherwise very sweet girlfriend to use a larger dildo on her. And in the back of my mind I’ve been sort of hoping for her to tease/degrade me for having a small penis. Which is an impulse I’d have never thought I’d have. As a kid/young teen I had two sort of negative experiences around being teased for the size of my penis, and now that something sort of similar is coming from someone I love and trust it feels thrilling and arousing.

I guess I’m just wondering if this is healthy, and if it’s something I should explore further with her. My main concern is that talking to her about it will change the way she looks at me outside of sex.

[KierC]

Hey Booper, and welcome to the boards

As long as the size comparison play feels good for both of you, you communicate about it, and when you don’t feel good about it you also communicate that with her, then this sounds like a healthy thing to explore! Can you tell me a little more about your concern that she’ll view you differently outside of sex if you communicate with her?

You might find this article helpful as you think about communicating and exploring this with her: https://www.scarleteen.com/read/relatio ... ex-partner

If you give that a read through and let me know if you have questions or thoughts about it, I’d be happy to talk about that as well.