Questioning my sexuality among hatred.

[twerkforpandas]

I'm a Christian and I believe that God is love, that he made us perfect, our sexuality and all. After the Supreme Court ruling was heard around the world I was overjoyed for society, where common sense and decency prevailed. But with all the love there was a mountain of hatred. I've found out I'm the only Christian it seems who believes that we are all cherished by God and nothing can change that, especially our sexuality. I've been questioning my sexual orientation for over a year, I finally got up enough courage to tell some close friends that I might be bisexual and am questioning. I want to get married and have kids one day with a man, but I'm attracted to girls and I'm confused. I'm so confused. I'm upset that I don't know, and I'm upset that I'm allowing other people to change my beliefs about God.

[Heather]

I promise you that you are by no means anything close to the only Christian -- or Catholic, or Muslim, or person of any given religion -- who is or may be something other than straight, nor who, whatever your orientation, believes that sexual orientation is a non-issue with a god like you do. I'm so sorry to hear that you ever had to have the idea you were alone in that, because a) that's a terrible way to feel, and b) it's not even remotely close to true.

I'm going to get you started with just a couple links and book suggestions, so you can do some exploring for yourself to see that you're in plenty of good company here.

• http://www.religiousinstitute.org/lgbt-equality/
• http://www.believeoutloud.com/backgroun ... we-believe
• http://bulletproofbook.com/about-2/
• And this one may be particularly helpful for you right now: http://www.believeoutloud.com/latest/5- ... christians

In terms of questioning, you may find this piece helpful: Q is for Questioning.

[twerkforpandas]

Thank you, Heather, so much. Honestly as a teenager in the deep south it's been especially hard with so much oppression and struggling with my own morality. I'll be sure to check out the links.

[Heather]

I get it. That's a very rough place to be, literally and figuratively. But I promise you that even where you live, you're very much not alone. Sounds like at a minimum, it's time for you to try and diversify your community -- including your faith community -- some, especially if it's really looking like you really are the only Christian who feels the way you do, as that'd be evidence that community is very insular.

You might also want to see if there are any Unitarian Universalist churches near you and check one out. That's a church community where a lot of LGBT Christians have found the kind of spiritual community that both supports their belief system, but also strongly, and without exception, is supportive for them as LGBT people.

And don't forget: there is literally NO discussion of bisexuality or homosexuality anywhere in the Bible. Literally, none. There is discussion of same-sex rape, and there is that bit that talks about man not lying with men as with woman (which some people decide to interpret as being about this, but that's a very selective interpretation, especially given when it was written, at a time when homosexuality wasn't even a concept yet). But there is no actual, clear address of any of this in that book, which is usually held up as the basis of Christian faiths.