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Any pointers for a girl in her first lesbian relationship?

Questions and discussions about relationships: girlfriends, boyfriends, lovers, partners, friends, family or other intimate relationships in your lives.
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Cellobello
newbie
Posts: 2
Joined: Tue Nov 24, 2015 4:25 pm
Age: 23
Awesomeness Quotient: I play the cello
Primary language: English
Pronouns: She/her
Sexual identity: Lesbian
Location: Dublin

Any pointers for a girl in her first lesbian relationship?

Unread post by Cellobello »

Hi I'm new here so please be kind x Today was a big day for me, I'm 14 years old and I was asked out by my best friend of two years who has just recently came out, I always have had a bit of a crush on her so I was thrilled :D this is my first lesbian relationship and was wondering if anyone had any tips for me, it would be much appreciated. Thanks x
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Heather
scarleteen founder & director
Posts: 9687
Joined: Sun Jul 27, 2014 11:43 am
Age: 54
Awesomeness Quotient: I have been a sex educator for over 25 years!
Primary language: english
Pronouns: they/them
Sexual identity: queery-queer-queer
Location: Chicago

Re: Any pointers for a girl in her first lesbian relationship?

Unread post by Heather »

Aw, congratulations! That's a big deal, and a great thing! :)

You know, there aren't really things anyone does differently in queer relationships. All the same stuff people do to have happy, healthy, mutually beneficial relationships apply to queer relationships. Would you like me to hook you up with some content about healthy relationships and dating?

Too, if you lead with the happyhappyjoyjoy you have going on now, that's always a super big player in relationships that everyone in them enjoys. :D
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead
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Volleygirl22
not a newbie
Posts: 66
Joined: Sat Oct 17, 2015 8:52 pm
Awesomeness Quotient: Can spike a volleyball, but am only 4'9"
Primary language: English
Pronouns: She/her
Sexual identity: Les
Location: Illinois

Re: Any pointers for a girl in her first lesbian relationship?

Unread post by Volleygirl22 »

Congrats! I'm bi (well bi curious anyway). I've been with another girl before and I'll admit it was pretty fun. I have a boyfriend now, and I kinda figured at one point that he'd think I was weird when I told him about it, but he didn't have any problem at all, and said it's great that I'm comfortable. Heather said what I would've said: other than the fact that it's a same sex relationship, there's nothing else different. It's still a relationship. Be yourself and have fun! It's not like you can't do certain relationship-y things. I've been in one same sex relationship before, and it went well, so feel free to ask if you want any other help :) Good luck :)
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Cellobello
newbie
Posts: 2
Joined: Tue Nov 24, 2015 4:25 pm
Age: 23
Awesomeness Quotient: I play the cello
Primary language: English
Pronouns: She/her
Sexual identity: Lesbian
Location: Dublin

Re: Any pointers for a girl in her first lesbian relationship?

Unread post by Cellobello »

Heather wrote:Would you like me to hook you up with some content about healthy relationships and dating?


Yes, that would be really helpful :) thanks!
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Sam W
previous staff/volunteer
Posts: 10320
Joined: Mon Jul 28, 2014 9:06 am
Age: 33
Awesomeness Quotient: I raise carnivorous plants
Primary language: english
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: queer
Location: Coast

Re: Any pointers for a girl in her first lesbian relationship?

Unread post by Sam W »

Hi Cellobello,

Congrats on the new relationship! I don't know if Heather will have some suggestions to add, but some pieces from us include:
Hello, Sailor! How to Build, Board and Navigate a Healthy Relationship
Supermodel: Creating & Nurturing Your Own Best Relationship Models
And you to whom adversity has dealt the final blow/with smiling bastards lying to you everywhere you go/turn to and put out all your strength of arm and heart and brain/and like the Mary Ellen Carter rise again.
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Heather
scarleteen founder & director
Posts: 9687
Joined: Sun Jul 27, 2014 11:43 am
Age: 54
Awesomeness Quotient: I have been a sex educator for over 25 years!
Primary language: english
Pronouns: they/them
Sexual identity: queery-queer-queer
Location: Chicago

Re: Any pointers for a girl in her first lesbian relationship?

Unread post by Heather »

I'd add one more to that list that I think might be a particularly good fit for you: http://www.scarleteen.com/article/gende ... ing_a_girl

:)
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead
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