Was it an orgasm?

Questions and discussion about your sexual lives, choices, activities, ideas and experiences.
geodude123
not a newbie
Posts: 7
Joined: Sat Oct 31, 2015 8:10 pm
Age: 27

Was it an orgasm?

Unread post by geodude123 »

Ive started having more sex than usual with my girlfriend but because of limited time and a few insecurities and inexperience and we only do it in a car 90% of the time, we havent been able to explore too much. Ive manage to open her up more to tell me when im hitting the spot and when she feels like shes bout to cum but shes never sure if she did or not( we were both virgins before we met) We recently started getting into doggystyle she says its more intense and the other day I manage to get a good rhythm in the car for the going for the first time and she was enjoying it ALOT and I think she was saying something was about to happen but I didnt notice any signs of her having a orgasm other than after a while I was about to reposition myself and she told me dont move and she was pushing bank n forth on it. I hadnt finished and she didnt seem done and she was really enjoying it so I kept going but all of a sudden she tightened up, EXTREMELY it got really hot too and I kept stroking but it got really dry. This never happened before so what happened. Did she O, or could she have thought of something that threw her off. Note: It was also really awkward before we started because she came just to have sex real quick and said she had to be somewher in a hour but she kept throwing the mood off during kissing and beating around the bush and we almost didnt have PIV cause I wasnt feeling it and couldnt get hard and everytime I did she'd do something weird and it went soft, but we hit reset and finally got started. Could that have been the reason?
Also, She told me before she thinks she came at times and I might hear her get really wet and see her eyes roll back a bit( but that happens alot when I go faster and harder). Lately Ive managed to switch it up cause a lil more time and I felt her contracting and she was moving around a bit. I asked her what happened,did you orgasm she said she didnt know it just felt amazing then the time she got tighter I mentioned earlier happened the other day. Is there a difference in orgasm and cumming.
I also need advice because its hard to incorporate getting better at what to do when shes cumming and noticing signs when she never knows whats going on with her body :lol:. Shell tell me to slow down she doesnt want to finish so soon but when I do and pick up the speed later and finish shes not satisfied. I try to get her to finish or leave her satisfied but its hard when she forces me to stop in the middle of it because it feels good and later says she fills unsatisfied and wants to go again after ive already finished and need to recover or only had one rubber. I know shes capable of feeling something about to happen then can tell me something happened and she didnt reach it. Im tryng to see if shes the type to orgasms from PIV and a lil kissing and rubbing only and if shes a multiple orgasm person and how long it takes her to recover but its hard because she cant really communicate well so if you could help me with that too, I would appreciate that.
Onionpie
not a newbie
Posts: 258
Joined: Tue Jul 29, 2014 6:56 am
Age: 32
Awesomeness Quotient: Absolutely Everything
Primary language: English
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: fluid
Location: Ontario, Canada

Re: Was it an orgasm?

Unread post by Onionpie »

Hi geodude123. Unfortunately, since we weren't there and we're not your girlfriend, we won't be able to tell you that she definitely had an orgasm or not. However, we can give you some information that will help you both understand your bodies more, and so she will be able to begin to recognise when she orgasms and what makes that happen. So, let's get started!

First off, I will mention that 75% of women can NOT orgasm from PIV intercourse alone. That 75% needs to have something else involved to be able to achieve orgasm. So while yes, there is still 25% of women who will orgasm from intercourse by itself, that's not that many women. So chances are that your girlfriend WILL need more stimulation than just PIV.

Second of all, sometimes what can be confusing is that orgasms don't always feel exactly the same all the time. It depends on tons of different things, like how the person is feeling at the time, etc; so some days, an orgasm might feel really intense and you can feel it all through your body, whereas other times it might seem pretty tame. However, becoming more familiar with one's body will help anyone begin to recognise when they are orgasming.

So, my following advice is more for your girlfriend than for you, as this is about HER body! If SHE wants to start learning more about her own body and its responses, and if SHE wants to learn to recognise when she's orgasming, a really good way to go about that is masturbation. Masturbating gives a person the opportunity to explore what feels good for themselves in their own space, so they can really start to figure out what works. It also gets you more acquainted with how your body feels, for example, at different stages of arousal.

You can, of course, explore this together as well, but masturbation is really helpful for this kind of thing so she can do it on her own time and really focus entirely on herself and her own body. What will also really help you both begin to discover and understand each other's bodies more, is to really communicate. So start talking to each other about what different things really feel good or what feels kind of "eh", you could ask her to show you how she masturbates so you can see for yourself what kinds of things she finds pleasurable, whether you're feeling like having a certain kind of sex at that moment or not, whether you still want to continue what you're doing at the moment or maybe change to a different type of sex -- or just stop altogether, etc. Open communication is a huge part of making sex as pleasurable as possible for all involved!

I'll also provide a few articles that I recommend you BOTH read, as they have some information that will really help you both understand the way orgasm works, and the way your girlfriend's body works.

Sexual Response & Orgasm: A Users Guide

Innies & Outies: The Vagina, Clitoris, Uterus and More

With Pleasure: A View of Whole Sexual Anatomy for Every Body

Be a Blabbermouth! The Whats, Whys and Hows of Talking About Sex With a Partner
Post Reply Previous topicNext topic
  • Similar Topics
    Replies
    Views
    Last post