My boyfriend and I want to have sex

[Gracesmithy01]

Hi! I am 12 years old, and my boyfriend and I want to have sex. We have been dating for two years now, and we both want to have sex now. I was wondering what your thoughts are on this and if you have any advice for me and my boyfriend.

[Heather]

Hey, Grace:

Your registration lists you as being 15, not 12. Can you clear this discrepancy up for us first? Thanks!

[Gracesmithy01]

Whoops! I accidentally hit the 2 instead of the 5. I'm so sorry for any inconvenience.

[Heather]

Got it. United States COPPA law forbids us from collecting any personally identifying information -- which includes an email address -- for those under 13, which is why our boards don't allow for registrations from those under that age.

Really, whose thoughts matter on what kind of sex you have with your boyfriend, and when you do, are you and your boyfriend's thoughts. That's who any kind of sex impacts, after all, and who it is about.

So, the best place to start is going to be with your thoughts. What kind of sex are you thinking about, and what do YOU think about it? How do YOU feel? How prepared do you feel for all that it asks of you? How ready do you feel for the extra things it often asks of you and your life? What are you looking for in whatever kind of sex together it is you're thinking about? If you have concerns, what are they?

[Gracesmithy01]

We are thinking of doing traditional intercoarse. Neither of us want to use a condom and I don't want to take the day after pill. Are there any risks? And how likely is that I will become pregnant?

[Sam W]

Hi Grace,

So, having that kind of sex without any form of protection is very, very risky, because you have no protection against pregnancy or STIs. One of the things we encourage people who are thinking about having sex to do is to talk with their partner about how they will take precautions against those things. Would you be interested in some articles on how to choose a type of birth control? And, out of curiosity, why have you two decided against condoms?

[Gracesmithy01]

We decided to have sex the other day, and we decided that he should wear a condom; to be safe. It was my first time, and it was absolutely wonderful. I did not feel hardly any pain. We both had so much fun that we are probably going to have sex again soon. Thank for all your advice!