Sensibility / Emotion

[bigbywolf]

Hi all,

I want a sounding board for a dilemma in my life. To give context into my own situation, I'm in a six month relationship with a young man who I love. Like, love to the extent where I can imagine a life with him type love. But I know it's WAY too early to make that kind of call.

He wants to move overseas. I do too, eventually. But I enjoy my university course.

I always thought it was hugely irresponsible and dumb (I was judgmental, I've worked on that subsequently) to follow a person anywhere if it means you deviate from the plan you've made for yourself. But I also know you're meant to do what makes you happy. If being with your partner makes you happiest of all, is it still illogical to do everything to be with them (provided the relationship is a healthy one)?

My circumstance is only a slight example, because there are ways I can move around the dilemma. I can still study. Possibly become an exchange student, etc. But it would still come at a great loss to me earlier than anticipated. I haven't spoken to my partner at all about this yet, because I am still working on the right wording to express how good and healthy this relationship is, and even considering moving with him because I care about him so much.

I know there is too the possibility of long distance relationships, but I know that they are not the right move for me. I also know that if he and I break up, it is not the end of the world, I will find someone else to fall in love with.

I'd be interested to hear input. Especially considering I'm still in the honeymoon phase. He's not thinking about going overseas very seriously yet, but it has made me wander what I will do down the line.

[Jacob]

Hi bigbywolf!

My thought is that whichever option feels right for you is the best one to go for... Depending on where your partner goes you may feel many different ways about joining him.

I would recommend that if you do move, you have an idea of how a new place could work for you even if your relationship ends as it is a possibility.

With any sort of choice though I think the most important thing is just to be informed. So it's worth doing research into your various options so that it doesn't feel like a sacrifice but it's more of an informed positive decision.