I feel pleasure when my boyfriend touches me, but not when I touch myself.

[whatamI7]

I cannot masturbate. It just doesn't feel like anything. When he does it, though, it feels good.Why is this?

[Heather]

I don't know what "it" is, but I assume you mean a sexual activity he can do to you that you can also do yourself?

If so, it could be for a few reasons.

Maybe when he does it, you've been more turned on than you have been -- so far -- when you're alone. If so, you might see what happens if you let your mind work up some really good fantasy first: that could even be bringing up feelings and memories about your boyfriend, if that's what turns you on. Maybe he's doing whatever it is differently than you are: in that case, you could always ask him to show you. Maybe, in your head, you have pretty strong thoughts that sex with a partner is sexy or good and sex by yourself isn't: how we think about these things can actually make a difference with how they feel.

It could also be that what feels good to you with a partner isn't what feels good to you masturbating: it might be you haven't yet found what feels good yet for you masturbating, or what kinds of things feel good to you when you do them to yourself.

What do you think about all of that?