Is this normal?
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- not a newbie
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- Awesomeness Quotient: My confidence
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- Pronouns: She/her
- Sexual identity: Heterosexual
- Location: Georgia
Is this normal?
This past Saturday night I was with a particularly aggressive sexual partner. He penetrated me with his fingers (long fingernails) and we had oral sex. Immediately afterward, I was bleeding and my vagina was very swollen. Now, two days later, I have brownish discharge and mild irritation but the swelling has gone down. I'm not asking for a diagnosis as I'm aware that's against the rules. After asking two of my female friends if they've experienced this before, one said they had and it goes away. I'm just asking if this is normal or does it sound serious enough for me to seek professional medical advice? Any response is much appreciated
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- scarleteen founder & director
- Posts: 9703
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- Awesomeness Quotient: I have been a sex educator for over 25 years!
- Primary language: english
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- Sexual identity: queery-queer-queer
- Location: Chicago
Re: Is this normal?
Ouch, I'm sorry to hear about this.
It does sound like what probably happened is that you got scratched and/or abraded from the fingernails and, if this partner was also rough on top of that (and worse still, without using enough lube), from that, too. That brownish discharge is likely just "old" blood mixed with discharge. Since there's not likely anything a healthcare provider can do in these instances, and it doesn't sound like you're in pain, I'd just wait it out and give your vagina some rest and TLC in the meantime. Don't engage in any kind of vaginal sex until you feel all the way better.
Preventatively is where you can do a bit more. For once, it is 100% okay to ask a sex partner to cut and file their damn nails (I mean seriously, right?) before putting them into your pants and certainly into your vagina OR to wear a latex glove to help cover their nails if they are attached to their nails. Just so you know, in case you didn't. It most certainly is also okay to ask a partner to chill out and to use more lube whenever you want, and if you want to avoid injury, things like using lube, not being SO aggressive (we live, we learn), and either cutting nails or covering them are key.
In the event things change and you are in pain, or if the rawness/soreness or bleeding doesn't stop in another few days, then I'd go ahead and give your sexual healthcare provider a call. Mind, that's also something you can do -- just call, without need for a whole appointment -- anytime. You could get their advice on this, too, by just calling in.
It does sound like what probably happened is that you got scratched and/or abraded from the fingernails and, if this partner was also rough on top of that (and worse still, without using enough lube), from that, too. That brownish discharge is likely just "old" blood mixed with discharge. Since there's not likely anything a healthcare provider can do in these instances, and it doesn't sound like you're in pain, I'd just wait it out and give your vagina some rest and TLC in the meantime. Don't engage in any kind of vaginal sex until you feel all the way better.
Preventatively is where you can do a bit more. For once, it is 100% okay to ask a sex partner to cut and file their damn nails (I mean seriously, right?) before putting them into your pants and certainly into your vagina OR to wear a latex glove to help cover their nails if they are attached to their nails. Just so you know, in case you didn't. It most certainly is also okay to ask a partner to chill out and to use more lube whenever you want, and if you want to avoid injury, things like using lube, not being SO aggressive (we live, we learn), and either cutting nails or covering them are key.
In the event things change and you are in pain, or if the rawness/soreness or bleeding doesn't stop in another few days, then I'd go ahead and give your sexual healthcare provider a call. Mind, that's also something you can do -- just call, without need for a whole appointment -- anytime. You could get their advice on this, too, by just calling in.
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead
-
- not a newbie
- Posts: 5
- Joined: Sun Jan 14, 2018 3:19 pm
- Age: 24
- Awesomeness Quotient: My confidence
- Primary language: English
- Pronouns: She/her
- Sexual identity: Heterosexual
- Location: Georgia
Re: Is this normal?
Thank you so much Heather! That seems to be what happened, I think you're right. I will wait it out a few more days as it seems to get better and maybe call my doctor just to be safe. I definitely learned from this experience and will make sure fingernails are filed in the future Thanks again!
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- scarleteen founder & director
- Posts: 9703
- Joined: Sun Jul 27, 2014 11:43 am
- Age: 54
- Awesomeness Quotient: I have been a sex educator for over 25 years!
- Primary language: english
- Pronouns: they/them
- Sexual identity: queery-queer-queer
- Location: Chicago
Re: Is this normal?
Ideally, the person with the fingernails has that basic consideration, you know? People. I tell you.
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead
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