Scarleteen

Is it ok to ask someone you know if they're turned on over facebook messenger? This person flirted with me in real life, so I did that a few weeks later over fb messenger. Now I'm scared I harassed them.

Hi Raymie,

Whether or not something like that is okay depends a lot on how that person feels about you (both in general and in the moment) and the context of the conversation. For instance, if the conversation was getting increasingly sexual, then a question like that isn't a huge reach. But if you asked it in the middle of a non-sexual conversation, or sent that as your first message, then there could easily be overstepping what's appropriate. Too, how the other person reacted is also important. Did they react positively, or did they pull back from the conversation?