i hate gender

Questions and discussions about gender, gender roles and identity.
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tos3
not a newbie
Posts: 29
Joined: Mon Jan 05, 2015 8:26 pm
Age: 28
Pronouns: she/they/xe
Sexual identity: gender is meaningless
Location: U.S.

i hate gender

Unread post by tos3 »

Yesterday I had an argument with someone on how whether parents should raise their kids genderless. I left that conversation with a hot, burning lump in my throat and a feeling like I want to vomit.

The only other time I've felt that dysphoric was when I had a delusion (I have a schizoid disorder) that I was a trans man (I am a cis female, and have been all my life)

I don't know what this means. I think about having a penis, I feel really uncomfortable. And yet...?
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Heather
scarleteen founder & director
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Awesomeness Quotient: I have been a sex educator for nearly 30 years!
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Location: Chicago

Re: i hate gender

Unread post by Heather »

By all means some of us feel that way, like ideally, we'd just want the whole business erased (I'm one of those people, too).

But of course, many others don't, and do feel pretty strongly about having an internal sense of gender that is valuable and meaningful to them.

So, a genderless world? Probably just not going to happen, and it'd be a good thing for some people, while it'd leave others feeling lousy, too.

What do you feel like you need around this, and how can we help?
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead
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tos3
not a newbie
Posts: 29
Joined: Mon Jan 05, 2015 8:26 pm
Age: 28
Pronouns: she/they/xe
Sexual identity: gender is meaningless
Location: U.S.

Re: i hate gender

Unread post by tos3 »

I don't really know who I am. I'm still figuring that out. What should I do in the meantime to make sure I'm healthy?
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Heather
scarleteen founder & director
Posts: 10767
Joined: Sun Jul 27, 2014 1:43 pm
Age: 55
Awesomeness Quotient: I have been a sex educator for nearly 30 years!
Primary language: english
Pronouns: they/them
Sexual identity: queery-queer-queer
Location: Chicago

Re: i hate gender

Unread post by Heather »

Healthy in what respect?

Also, my sense is that all of life is pretty much a process of finding out who we are, especially since who that is is ever changing. It's not like someone reaches a certain age or stage of life and can truly have that all sorted out. :)
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead
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tos3
not a newbie
Posts: 29
Joined: Mon Jan 05, 2015 8:26 pm
Age: 28
Pronouns: she/they/xe
Sexual identity: gender is meaningless
Location: U.S.

Re: i hate gender

Unread post by tos3 »

Healthy in that I don't feel so bad about myself.
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Heather
scarleteen founder & director
Posts: 10767
Joined: Sun Jul 27, 2014 1:43 pm
Age: 55
Awesomeness Quotient: I have been a sex educator for nearly 30 years!
Primary language: english
Pronouns: they/them
Sexual identity: queery-queer-queer
Location: Chicago

Re: i hate gender

Unread post by Heather »

In terms of your gender? If so, you truly are the expert of you, so what do YOU think would help you? What do you think you need to feel better about yourself when it comes to gender?
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead
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