Can't say I love you

[andrej]

Hello there!

I am 22-year-old male and I've been in a relationship with this girl for over 3 years now. I do love her, but I have a really hard time saying these words out loud. For some reason,whenever I try to say that, I feel extreme tightness in my throat and it's just mentally and physically painful to say it out loud. She has learned that I will try to find other ways to express these feelings and she says it is okay with her because she knows I do love her. Still, I think it would be good for me to try to figure it out and would like to ask You to help me out if You can.
Thank you!

[Heather]

What's your history with those words? In other words, have they always been tough for you with others you have loved, like friends or family? Do you have any baggage from your life history attached to those words, or bad experiences?

As well, do you have any sense of what makes you uncomfortable about saying how you feel out loud? For instance, are you afraid of something with them, like, for example, that they commit you to something, or open you up to vulnerability or rejection?