HI! I'm a 16-year-old girl and I'm having a bit of problem and im geting really worried... I think that im numb to some things, the only things that give me pleasure is when I get into a tab full of water, turn on the water, remove the shower head and press the tip of shower against my clitoris until I orgasm, and also when my boyfriend rubbed me trough my pants and that felt kind of nice. He one tried fingering me and I barely felt a thing, I only felt myself stretching out for the first time , I really don't think I had pleasure from that, and then when I tried fingering myself i felt absulutly no pleasure. Also when I try to rub my vulva it doesn't feel good either, only with the pressure of the water. I feel the estimulation well on my nipples but other than this things, I don't feel nothing and I feel really numb, I don't wanna hurt my boyfriends feelings and tell him that don't I don't feel nothing because he told me that he really wants to pleasure me and I'm also afraid that I won't feel nothing (but pain at first at least) when we have sex.
Sorry for my bad English and thank you for taking the time to read this.
I'm kind of numb...
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Unknown girl
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Karyn
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Re: I'm kind of numb...
Welcome to Scarleteen, Unknown girl.
From what you've said here, it doesn't sound like there's anything wrong with you. Different people like different kinds of stimulation, and you've already identified a couple of things that feel good to you. In addition to that, some people find that they need more intense stimulation (like a stream of water) for things to feel really pleasurable, whereas other folks don't need as much, but there's nothing wrong with that: that's just another way in which everyone is different.
As for not feeling much when your boyfriend fingers you, if all he was doing was putting fingers inside your vagina (and you weren't really turned on first) then it's not really a surprise it didn't feel like much. The vaginal canal doesn't have nearly as many nerve endings as the clitoris and the rest of the vulva, and most people with vaginas don't reach orgasm from vaginal entry alone.
There are a couple of pieces on the main site that will hopefully clear this up even more for you:
Sexual Response & Orgasm: A Users Guide
The Great No-Orgasm-from-Intercourse Conundrum
With Pleasure: A View of Whole Sexual Anatomy for Every Body
From what you've said here, it doesn't sound like there's anything wrong with you. Different people like different kinds of stimulation, and you've already identified a couple of things that feel good to you. In addition to that, some people find that they need more intense stimulation (like a stream of water) for things to feel really pleasurable, whereas other folks don't need as much, but there's nothing wrong with that: that's just another way in which everyone is different.
As for not feeling much when your boyfriend fingers you, if all he was doing was putting fingers inside your vagina (and you weren't really turned on first) then it's not really a surprise it didn't feel like much. The vaginal canal doesn't have nearly as many nerve endings as the clitoris and the rest of the vulva, and most people with vaginas don't reach orgasm from vaginal entry alone.
There are a couple of pieces on the main site that will hopefully clear this up even more for you:
Sexual Response & Orgasm: A Users Guide
The Great No-Orgasm-from-Intercourse Conundrum
With Pleasure: A View of Whole Sexual Anatomy for Every Body
"Where there is power, there is resistance." -Michel Foucault
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