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I don't cry a lot, but I feel like this is a bad thing...
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I don't cry a lot, but I feel like this is a bad thing...
Like, I know I have had severe depression, and back then I was pretty much empty. And I feel like I still am empty because I'm not always crying when I'm severely upset, maybe it's just me letting my mother get into my head again, but I feel like I'm still suffering from it even though I've made a significant recovery. (Although, I also suppress my emotions around her to avoid them being exploited.)
"You are a dreamcatcher, you are beautiful to look at and you take the bad away and only give people the good." - Andrea Blankenship
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Re: I don't cry a lot, but I feel like this is a bad thing...
Hi Kittypink,
I think it might help to think of crying as something that happens to be some people's automatic sad reaction, while for other people it just isn't as automatic. There's nothing wrong with being someone who doesn't cry easily. With depression especially it's not a good indicator of how someone is doing. Some people describe feeling blank or empty, rather than crying constantly, in the moments where their depression was the strongest.
When you say you think this may be your mom getting into your head, can you tell me a little more about what you mean?
I think it might help to think of crying as something that happens to be some people's automatic sad reaction, while for other people it just isn't as automatic. There's nothing wrong with being someone who doesn't cry easily. With depression especially it's not a good indicator of how someone is doing. Some people describe feeling blank or empty, rather than crying constantly, in the moments where their depression was the strongest.
When you say you think this may be your mom getting into your head, can you tell me a little more about what you mean?
And you to whom adversity has dealt the final blow/with smiling bastards lying to you everywhere you go/turn to and put out all your strength of arm and heart and brain/and like the Mary Ellen Carter rise again.
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- Location: Parma,Ohio
Re: I don't cry a lot, but I feel like this is a bad thing...
Well, she's saying I'm still severely depressed as I was back then, and I'm not getting "proper treatment."Sam W wrote:Hi Kittypink,
I think it might help to think of crying as something that happens to be some people's automatic sad reaction, while for other people it just isn't as automatic. There's nothing wrong with being someone who doesn't cry easily. With depression especially it's not a good indicator of how someone is doing. Some people describe feeling blank or empty, rather than crying constantly, in the moments where their depression was the strongest.
When you say you think this may be your mom getting into your head, can you tell me a little more about what you mean?
She's also making it out that I'm not trans and rather just ashamed with being an "emotional boy", because I try to suppress my emotions around her because they were used against me at one point.
"You are a dreamcatcher, you are beautiful to look at and you take the bad away and only give people the good." - Andrea Blankenship
***Transfeminine***
LIVE AND LEARN
***Transfeminine***
LIVE AND LEARN
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Re: I don't cry a lot, but I feel like this is a bad thing...
I wonder, what does she consider "proper treatment?" And how do you feel your treatment for depression is working right now? Do you want it to change or are you pretty satisfied?
With the emotional boy comment, as much as possible try to put that aside with all the other nonsense she says trying to invalidate your identity. Or are her comments about your emotional level making you feel like you're somehow doing your gender "wrong?"
With the emotional boy comment, as much as possible try to put that aside with all the other nonsense she says trying to invalidate your identity. Or are her comments about your emotional level making you feel like you're somehow doing your gender "wrong?"
And you to whom adversity has dealt the final blow/with smiling bastards lying to you everywhere you go/turn to and put out all your strength of arm and heart and brain/and like the Mary Ellen Carter rise again.
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- not a newbie
- Posts: 378
- Joined: Thu Nov 17, 2016 2:11 pm
- Age: 24
- Awesomeness Quotient: I do art.
- Primary language: English
- Pronouns: Xe/Xir or She/her
- Sexual identity: Lesbian, switch, polyam, rope addict.
- Location: Parma,Ohio
Re: I don't cry a lot, but I feel like this is a bad thing...
I'm satisfied with my care that is working. A lot of the depression was because of dysphoria, plus her calling me a liar, selfish and a bunch of other nasty things as well as some other stuff that was going on as well as the fact I was still figuring myself out.Sam W wrote:I wonder, what does she consider "proper treatment?" And how do you feel your treatment for depression is working right now? Do you want it to change or are you pretty satisfied?
With the emotional boy comment, as much as possible try to put that aside with all the other nonsense she says trying to invalidate your identity. Or are her comments about your emotional level making you feel like you're somehow doing your gender "wrong?"
"You are a dreamcatcher, you are beautiful to look at and you take the bad away and only give people the good." - Andrea Blankenship
***Transfeminine***
LIVE AND LEARN
***Transfeminine***
LIVE AND LEARN
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Re: I don't cry a lot, but I feel like this is a bad thing...
Happy to hear that you are feeling good with your mental health care--ultimately that is what matters: whether or not you feel it is helping! And as always, I'm sorry to hear about the ways your mom has invalidated your identity and said really mean, hurtful things to you
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