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Hookups and Friends With Benefits

Questions and discussions about relationships: girlfriends, boyfriends, lovers, partners, friends, family or other intimate relationships in your lives.
idk anymore
not a newbie
Posts: 97
Joined: Tue Dec 15, 2020 7:22 am
Age: 19
Awesomeness Quotient: I have a pretty good sense of humor
Primary language: English
Pronouns: He/Him
Sexual identity: Pan, mostly
Location: Epping, NH

Hookups and Friends With Benefits

Unread post by idk anymore »

So, I'm aware of the concept of hookup culture and friends with benefits. How does someone establish such a relationship without sounding creepy. Its not like I can just go up to random people and say, "YOOOOO WANNA FUCK?"
I hate the word homophobia. It's not a phobia. You're not scared. You're an asshole.

~Morgan Freeman
Sam W
previous staff/volunteer
Posts: 10320
Joined: Mon Jul 28, 2014 9:06 am
Age: 33
Awesomeness Quotient: I raise carnivorous plants
Primary language: english
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: queer
Location: Coast

Re: Hookups and Friends With Benefits

Unread post by Sam W »

Hi idk anymore,

It depends a lot on how a person prefers to meet their potential partners. For instance, some people who use dating apps will list that they're only interested in casual sex. Or, someone might flirt with someone in person and build up to asking if they'd like to have sex. This article gives a good overview of the ways people can make those relationships work: Casual...Cool? Making Choices About Casual Sex.
And you to whom adversity has dealt the final blow/with smiling bastards lying to you everywhere you go/turn to and put out all your strength of arm and heart and brain/and like the Mary Ellen Carter rise again.
idk anymore
not a newbie
Posts: 97
Joined: Tue Dec 15, 2020 7:22 am
Age: 19
Awesomeness Quotient: I have a pretty good sense of humor
Primary language: English
Pronouns: He/Him
Sexual identity: Pan, mostly
Location: Epping, NH

Re: Hookups and Friends With Benefits

Unread post by idk anymore »

what about for not adults
I hate the word homophobia. It's not a phobia. You're not scared. You're an asshole.

~Morgan Freeman
Sam W
previous staff/volunteer
Posts: 10320
Joined: Mon Jul 28, 2014 9:06 am
Age: 33
Awesomeness Quotient: I raise carnivorous plants
Primary language: english
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: queer
Location: Coast

Re: Hookups and Friends With Benefits

Unread post by Sam W »

A lot of the suggestions in that article still apply, but the ways of meeting people will be different. For teenagers, most of the time potential partners come from school or from hobbies and clubs or, like adults, you may meet someone who starts off as friend who you have sexual chemistry with, and the two of you decide you'd like to try a friends with benefits situation.
And you to whom adversity has dealt the final blow/with smiling bastards lying to you everywhere you go/turn to and put out all your strength of arm and heart and brain/and like the Mary Ellen Carter rise again.
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