Hi there hopefully this is the correct spot to put this… I’m an afab transmasc person who’s 3 months on testosterone.
With being on t I have noticed an increase in my libido.. before being on t I didn’t have a libido and almost entirely identified as just homo-romantic. I would say I’m asexual but with the increased libido it has me confused on sexuality.. like I don’t really seek out having sex with others and can live without it in a relationship because it doesn’t interest me much but… I have/do masturbate. The problem I seem to be having is when I do masturbate I feel little to no sensation at all. I’m not sure if that’s normal for someone who’s on such a libido increasing hormone.. I’ve tried vaginal penetration with fingers and toys but it just feels like I’m rubbing the inside of my mouth. I’ve tried stimulating my clitoris and I don’t feel anything special either. I’m not sure if there’s something I could be doing better or if that means that I actually am asexual. But what if I say that i am asexual and it turns out to be an underlying medical issue. It doesn’t hurt when I masturbate but I just don’t feel pleasure. I don’t know what to do/say at this point. I’m really confused. Does this mean I’m asexual? If not any advice?
On hrt and can’t feel pleasure. Advice?
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Re: On hrt and can’t feel pleasure. Advice?
Hi Nic_S,
When you masturbate, do you tend to be pretty engaged in a fantasy or piece of sexual media? Or is it more that you feel a lot of arousal, but when you actually go to masturbate your brain is bored or otherwise not super engaged in what's going on?
Too, the increase in libido doesn't necessarily negate your asexuality. Asexual folks can and do experience arousal and desire, and have about as varied experiences with masturbation as allosexual people do. So, if asexual still feels like it captures your overall feelings around sex and sexual relationships, then it's still the word you get to use to described your sexual orientation (and really, it would be that regardless of what I thought, because you are the ultimate boss of how best to describe your experiences).
When you masturbate, do you tend to be pretty engaged in a fantasy or piece of sexual media? Or is it more that you feel a lot of arousal, but when you actually go to masturbate your brain is bored or otherwise not super engaged in what's going on?
Too, the increase in libido doesn't necessarily negate your asexuality. Asexual folks can and do experience arousal and desire, and have about as varied experiences with masturbation as allosexual people do. So, if asexual still feels like it captures your overall feelings around sex and sexual relationships, then it's still the word you get to use to described your sexual orientation (and really, it would be that regardless of what I thought, because you are the ultimate boss of how best to describe your experiences).
And you to whom adversity has dealt the final blow/with smiling bastards lying to you everywhere you go/turn to and put out all your strength of arm and heart and brain/and like the Mary Ellen Carter rise again.
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