The ex and his friend, my friend.

[FairyEve]

The other night a male friend and I were talking. I was mentioning that I'm seeing Fifty Shades of Grey and he wanted to see it as well. So, since we live close we're going to see it together.

In our conversation he divulged to me he hasn't had sexual intercourse in 3 years. This came up in a conversation about Fifty Shades or Grey, I mentioned that I was sexually frustrated and then he told me the same thing. He then asked for us to experiment and see where things go. Since, we're close (not close close) we talk and hangout sometimes. He doesn't want to jump into it right away and that we have lots of time. So this isn't rushed at all.

Here is where the problem starts. I met him through my ex. I got introduced to him by my ex when I met some of his friends. So, he and I talked about my ex and that we both don't want him to know because it comes down to our business and no one else is. He and the ex are close friends and last thing I want is something bad happening.

Another thing is he is bisexual and is in a relationship but his boyfriend/friend lives 6 hours away and when he visits nothing happens (they are on rocks and sounds like they aren't going to work out. It also sounds like he doesn't want to be in the relationship cause he isn't getting anything out of it), like they don't do any sexual activities. Which is where the sexually frustrated comes in.

I've always had a interest in him and he doesn't want to rush into things if we do experiment together.

If something does happen between us, how does that go when he is my ex close friend?

Apologize if this sounds confusing...

[Keda]

I wonder, why do you both feel that your ex wouldn't be happy if you started dating/friends-with-benefits-ing?

P.S. I hope you enjoyed the movie. I also hope you both recognised that it depicts an extremely abusive relationship, and if anyone ever treats you like that you should run away and call the police.

[Kaizen]

Since you mentioned it, I do want to bring in the friend's boyfriend, and whether he knows this would be going on. While you aren't responsible for someone else's commitment to their relationship, you get to decide whether you're personally comfortable being sexual with someone when they have a significant other who doesn't know about it. You probably also want to bear in mind that significant others do often hold the cheated-with more responsible than the cheater, even though it's illogical and unfair.