having a LOT of trouble with my sex drive/stimulation, help?

[marcille]

i'm a teenager, and for a while i've been having a ton of confusing feelings. i hear a lot about how self-stimulation and masturbation can help you figure out stuff about yourself, like about what you like. i used to masturbate a LONG time ago, like when i was younger and didn't know what it was, it was nothing serious. i just know that I used to feel something. but, recently, i have been trying lots of methods to stimulate myself and nothing works. clitoral stimulation is supposed to be the most effective, but i feel absolutely no stimulation when i try. I haven't tried to go farther than that, since i'm a scaredy cat and want to get used to how these things feel. I guess the main issue for myself is that why did i use to feel something a while back, but nothing now? apologies that this post is so long.

[Latha]

Hi there, Marcille- welcome to the boards! Don't worry, the post isn't too long.

I can't give you a definite set of instructions that will make masturbation more pleasurable, but I can assure you that plenty of other people have been in your situation- some patience and trial and error usually do the trick.

To answer your question at the end: it's not unusual for a particular way of masturbating to work for a while, but then need some adjustments. Your experience of your sexuality can change over time, and is influenced by a number of things, including hormones and stress.

You're right that masturbation is one thing that can help you figure out what you like. If you want, you could also talk about the things you're confused about here- talking to someone may give you some clarity.

If you don't mind me asking, are you already in the mood when you begin to masturbate? While it is possible to become turned on just by masturbating, touching yourself when you're not in the mood may not feel very interesting. It could help to try getting in the mood beforehand by going through a relaxing routine or imagining something you like.

(P.S. Doing things in your own time doesn't make you a scaredy cat.)