Struggle masturbating

Questions and discussion about your sexual lives, choices, activities, ideas and experiences.
Jax-in-the-box
not a newbie
Posts: 8
Joined: Mon Nov 13, 2023 1:40 pm
Age: 15
Primary language: English
Pronouns: He/They
Sexual identity: Pansexual
Location: United States

Struggle masturbating

Unread post by Jax-in-the-box »

So when I try and touch myself, my legs start to shake, a little detail in this is im biologically female, but even if I'm easy when touching, my legs shake relatively close to when I start and touch. And I've seen the "it may be position" but I've tried to change that, and it's the same result. I'm stumped at this point. And to embarrassed to talk to someone in my life, my mom, or my doctor, more so because I'm a minor and don't wanna talk about that with someone face to face.

Sorry if this was already asked, or somehow breaks guidelines, I read them but still never used this site before
Heather
scarleteen founder & director
Posts: 9703
Joined: Sun Jul 27, 2014 11:43 am
Age: 54
Awesomeness Quotient: I have been a sex educator for over 25 years!
Primary language: english
Pronouns: they/them
Sexual identity: queery-queer-queer
Location: Chicago

Re: Struggle masturbating

Unread post by Heather »

Hey there, Jax, welcome to the boards.

So, is this a kind of shaking that keeps you from being comfortable or able, physically, or hurts in some way? Or is it just something that happens that you are wondering why it happens?
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead
Jax-in-the-box
not a newbie
Posts: 8
Joined: Mon Nov 13, 2023 1:40 pm
Age: 15
Primary language: English
Pronouns: He/They
Sexual identity: Pansexual
Location: United States

Re: Struggle masturbating

Unread post by Jax-in-the-box »

It doesn't hurt but it's uncomfortable and irritating, kinda like my body is trying to stop me, I guess I'm wondering why it happens, or at least how to stop or avoid it, but i posted this already coming it with the mindset its just something id have to deal with, also sorry if im being to vague still, I'm not great at any convos about topics like this
Sam W
previous staff/volunteer
Posts: 10320
Joined: Mon Jul 28, 2014 9:06 am
Age: 33
Awesomeness Quotient: I raise carnivorous plants
Primary language: english
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: queer
Location: Coast

Re: Struggle masturbating

Unread post by Sam W »

Hi Jax-in-the-box,

The most likely reason for this is that, when we're sexually aroused, we experience an increase in muscle tension that can result in that shaking. That tension and arousal can lead to involuntary muscle contractions, which we might experience as our legs shaking.

Would it be helpful to talk about some ways to maybe roll with this when it happens to see if you can continue masturbating? Or would you rather just use the shaking as a stopping point?
And you to whom adversity has dealt the final blow/with smiling bastards lying to you everywhere you go/turn to and put out all your strength of arm and heart and brain/and like the Mary Ellen Carter rise again.
Jax-in-the-box
not a newbie
Posts: 8
Joined: Mon Nov 13, 2023 1:40 pm
Age: 15
Primary language: English
Pronouns: He/They
Sexual identity: Pansexual
Location: United States

Re: Struggle masturbating

Unread post by Jax-in-the-box »

I guess ways to just roll with it
Sam W
previous staff/volunteer
Posts: 10320
Joined: Mon Jul 28, 2014 9:06 am
Age: 33
Awesomeness Quotient: I raise carnivorous plants
Primary language: english
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: queer
Location: Coast

Re: Struggle masturbating

Unread post by Sam W »

Okay! So, one option would be to ease up a little when you start shaking, or switch to a different kind of touch that you still find arousing or pleasurable but that doesn't seem to set off that same reaction. Too, depending on how much the shaking is interfering with the actual movements of masturbation, some people find that it helps to just sort of lean into it, or accept that it's happening, and try to to concentrate on the other sensations in their body or on a particularly engaging fantasy. Do any of those seem like things you could try?
And you to whom adversity has dealt the final blow/with smiling bastards lying to you everywhere you go/turn to and put out all your strength of arm and heart and brain/and like the Mary Ellen Carter rise again.
Jax-in-the-box
not a newbie
Posts: 8
Joined: Mon Nov 13, 2023 1:40 pm
Age: 15
Primary language: English
Pronouns: He/They
Sexual identity: Pansexual
Location: United States

Re: Struggle masturbating

Unread post by Jax-in-the-box »

Yeah, I can try some of those, thanks
Sam W
previous staff/volunteer
Posts: 10320
Joined: Mon Jul 28, 2014 9:06 am
Age: 33
Awesomeness Quotient: I raise carnivorous plants
Primary language: english
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: queer
Location: Coast

Re: Struggle masturbating

Unread post by Sam W »

You're welcome!
And you to whom adversity has dealt the final blow/with smiling bastards lying to you everywhere you go/turn to and put out all your strength of arm and heart and brain/and like the Mary Ellen Carter rise again.
Post Reply Previous topicNext topic
  • Similar Topics
    Replies
    Views
    Last post