Am I going crazy

Any questions or discussions that you ONLY want to discuss with our staff or volunteers.
(Users: please do not reply to other users here.)
Wanjiee
not a newbie
Posts: 16
Joined: Sat Nov 04, 2023 3:12 pm
Age: 21
Pronouns: She
Location: Kenya

Am I going crazy

Unread post by Wanjiee »

So a while back i told y'all this is my first healthy relationship but i feel like I'm ruining it. Well, thing is, Yes, I still think I'm ruining it. A while back I went to visit my guy. He lives like 5minutes away from my place. He has a roommate, i found this girl at their place... The girl looked comfy, she had on shorts and she was the only one there, i asked her what her name was and when she did, It's a girl who has been making me insecure in this relationship, she's been flirting with my guy and my guy was entertaining her but he stopped after i told him that's some level of disrespect and hurt and also he had told me how the girl doesn't have boundaries and I was like damn okay, the same girl you leave at your place, feeling entitled asking me why i am looking for my guy and stuff... Honestly i felt so hurt, and I've felt so insecure since then, my guy did come up with a solution, to talk to the girl about boundaries and maybe cut her off slowly by slowly
He also said that how he maintains boundaries is by leaving the house when that girl arrives, honestly, I don't know what to think, i once caught him deleting some chats from that girl and he told me the girl had sent a flirty text... Damn i feel really bad,. it's been a week and I'm still bothered by that girl... She's so pretty as well... I really like this guy, and honestly i believe him when he says he's cutting ties with her, but everytime i call him and his phone is off, I can't help but think that he's with this other girl💔what should I do?
Heather
scarleteen founder & director
Posts: 9675
Joined: Sun Jul 27, 2014 11:43 am
Age: 54
Awesomeness Quotient: I have been a sex educator for over 25 years!
Primary language: english
Pronouns: they/them
Sexual identity: queery-queer-queer
Location: Chicago

Re: Am I going crazy

Unread post by Heather »

Hey there, Wanjiee. I'm so sorry you're having such a hard time.

Before I dig into this post, I have a could questions to get some more information.

Is this the same guy you have posted about in the past? Too, this girl is going to his place to see him, or to see someone else? I'm not sure I understand what his relationship is to her -- are they friends? -- and why he'd leave his place when she gets there unless she is coming to see someone else?

Too, what does he mean by cutting her off slowly? Again, are they friends? (Sorry if I am being daft, I just don't get it.)

One last question just so I know when I answer: is this something where you'd feel comfortable asking to sit down with both of them and try and talk things out?
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead
Post Reply Previous topicNext topic
  • Similar Topics
    Replies
    Views
    Last post