pregnancy scare

[grace1019]

Hey I recently gave my boyfriend a handjob, he came in my hands, but i washed them afterwards. I was also fully dressed wearing jeans, and afterwards we just held each other. Also on a separate occasion we were spooing and I was laying against him,, he was fully clothed but i was wearing pj pants and no undies.. could i be pregnant at all?

[KierC]

Hi Grace1019, and welcome to the boards

Neither of the situations you’ve described pose a risk to pregnancy. For pregnancy to occur, you’d need direct genital-to-genital contact, which did not happen here. You can read more about how pregnancy occurs here: Human Reproduction: A Seafarer’s Guide


Also, here’s a good reference for which activities pose a risk to pregnancy: Can I Get Pregnant, Or Get Or Pass On An STI From That?

[grace1019]

Really? it cant even go thru jeans and its safe to cudddle after he finished and got dressed?

[KierC]

Correct, sperm cells can’t go through even one layer of fabric. It’s also safe to cuddle after he finishes, as you’re both clothed (2+ layers of fabric). Does hearing that help a bit?

[grace1019]

Yes but what about my second statement where i say on a separate day where we didnt do anything sexual at all but i wasnt wearing underwear but only pj pants. (he was wearing underwear and pants) But i started my fertile window

[KierC]

Wearing pajama pants counts as one layer of fabric, so you are protected from pregnancy. Too, it sounds like he was wearing more layers as well, so there is indeed no risk to pregnancy (Even in a more fertile window! The sperm cells just have no way of entering the vagina in this scenario.)

[grace1019]

Oh alright thank you so much, ive just been so anxious and over reading over little things wrong with me. Such as bloating , even tho i havent been drinking any water barley and finished my ovulation week.

[KierC]

You are welcome! I’m sorry to hear you’ve been feeling anxious recently. Is the anxiety you’re feeling mostly about pregnancy risk, or something else too?

[grace1019]

mainly about pregnancy risk, considering before this whenever i researched into if handjobs could cause pregnancy majority of sites stated there was a low risk, and that set me off on a spiral. Ive just had contradicting information

[KierC]

Ah, I hear you. It can be a bit confusing to get conflicting information. Handjobs do not pose a risk to pregnancy because the sperm cells are not entering the vagina. It might be helpful to read the Human Reproduction article I sent above, as that gives a clear explanation of how pregnancy occurs.

[grace1019]

I did read it, but sites such as planned parenthood etc say there is a low risk from handjobs..

[KierC]

I can’t speak for other websites, but to be honest, I just did a search of Planned Parenthood and am not seeing what you’re suggesting. The information we provide here is accurate and up-to-date.

If you would like support with the anxiety you’re feeling, or another topic, I’d be happy to help. But I cannot continue to answer the same question.

[grace1019]

id like help with anxiety over helping mh overthinming thoughts over this

[KierC]

Absolutely! So, I first want you to know you’re not alone here. We speak to folks all the time about anxiety with pregnancy risk; it can be scary to feel, and I hear you that the overthinking goes with it too.

I am about to clock out of my shift, but I will be here for part of the day tomorrow if you’d like to chat more about this. In the meantime, though, we have this article that says a lot of what I’d like to say about the anxiety part: https://www.scarleteen.com/read/pregnan ... ncy-scared (the section starts with “Not pregnant, still scared”). Too, if you’re feeling anxious in the meantime, this is my favorite resource: https://www.scarleteen.com/read/feeling ... -resources because it has a list of apps that can help you calm down right in the moment when you feel the overthinking cycle starting.

I hope this helps in the meantime, but I’ll be back tomorrow to reply more!

[grace1019]

is bloating after ur fertile window normall? also what would be situations i could get pregnant in ? just as another way to ease my anxiety

[KierC]

Yes, it’s normal to experience bloating during ovulation, and before or during your period. If you refer to the article I sent above, Can I Get Pregnant, Or Get Or Pass On An STI From That?, and scroll to moderate and high risk, you can see a list of activities that pose a risk to pregnancy and/or STIs.

[grace1019]

alright, so even it happened last weekend, and im bloating now/been bloated
That wouldnt have anything to do with pregnancy?

[KierC]

You are right. Since there was no risk, you can be sure this is not related to pregnancy.

[grace1019]

Alright thank you, so im good in all places? even the spooning with different amount of layers? I think we even have diff blankets over each other

[KierC]

You’re welcome, and yeah you’re good! From what you’ve told me so far, it sounds like you haven’t done any activity that poses any risk to pregnancy.

If it helps to remember: Sperm cannot fly through the air, and it can’t go through a layer of fabric. It also can’t go through multiple layers of fabric. Sperm is a small, fragile cell. It needs projectile force (like to be pushed through the vaginal canal) and a particular environment in order to survive. That means sperm just won’t go through fabric, and when exposed to the air (like after a handjob), the sperm will die very, very fast. So, spooning and cuddling is all good!

[grace1019]

alright thank you so so mychh youre a life saver

[KierC]

You are so welcome! I’m glad I could help.

[grace1019]

so the only way sperm can survive is through intercourse and cum inside?

[HannahP]

Hi Grace!

This article has a great list of acts that can and cannot cause pregnancy: You're Not Pregnant. Why Do You Think You Are?

The short version is that the only acts that pose a pregnancy risks are ones where your and your partners genitals directly touch, with nothing covering them OR if your partner ejaculates directly on or inside your vagina.

[grace1019]

Hey, thank you for your response, can you explain a litte more about that? are u sure theres no other way?