Late Period and Pregnancy Paranoia

[Janedee]

I am afraid of becoming pregnant. I believe so I am not, based on all the facts I have read about--which believe me, has been a lot. However the irrational thoughts seem to outweigh the ones that clearly make sense. All my boyfriend and I ever really engage on is manual sex and rarely humping. We rub our genitals together but there is never penetration and he hasn't ejaculated yet. He never penetrated me with his genitals. I am paranoid because my period hasn't arrived at the expected date it should. At one point this month, I vomited bile as soon as I woke up accompanied by diarrhea. Maybe it was just coincidental that my stomach was upset because it never happened again in the morning. Just sometimes within the day, I am not sure if I really am nauseated or my mind has just got me thinking I am. I have sore breasts only when it is touched like normal aches before a period. My period is due at a certain week this month and around that certain week, my boyfriend has fingered me. I had an orgasm and there was this light brown discharge. Ever since I started engaging with activities closely linked to sex, my period cramps have been worse. Last month my period came early and it was heavy and occurred 6-8 days. This month, it seems it's late. I am paranoid and frightened. I have been given facts that I am not pregnant but the negative thoughts in my mind are clearly overpowering me. I really am just expecting my period. It would be a massive relief if I get it. It would serve as proof and reassurance to me. Am I pregnant? Or is there anything wrong with me or my cycle?

[Eddie C]

We will not answer ANY questions about pregnancy fear or anxiety in our direct services from users who are not pregnant or who are not or have not otherwise been directly involved with an actual pregnancy.

Please do not post this kind of question. If you are seeing this text, and your thread is locked, it is because you have posted this kind of question.

We CAN and WILL talk about things like:
• choosing and using a method or methods of contraception for any future sexual activity
• creating your own sexual limits and boundaries based on your needs and/or presenting them to any partners
• making sexual choices that suit your own needs, abilities and limitations, including your own readiness for certain possible risks
• help locating or using emergency contraception if and when you have had a pregnancy risk
• discussing options with a real, existing pregnancy, and help finding and accessing those options, such as abortion services and pre-natal care, or discussing feelings or concerns about a past pregnancy
• help with anxiety like locating mental health services, sound self-help or asking for support from friends or family

It seems like being secually active is not feeling very safe for you. In order to enjoy sex before, during and after we need to feel comfortable with the risks we are taking and the choices we are making. If this is not your case and you just found out that sex is really making you only more anxious (which is okay!) I would recommend to talk to your partner and re-establish the limits and boundaries that will make you feel better. If you are interested in doing this and want our help to figure it out how, that is something we can do in a new thread.

For help dealing with a scare (including what poses a risk and your next steps based on your unique situation), you may use our tool on site built for this purpose: The Pregnancy Panic Companion.
For help with anxiety, click here.
For related help and information at Scarleteen, click here.
If you would like more information about this policy, click here.