I really just feel very upset right now.

[whatshouldido]

Please. Someone help me. I feel so depressed.
My siblings keep leaving me out.
My enemy has replaced me in my friend group.
I'm moving away from the world I know.
To top it all of, I'm ugly and fat.
All of this is making me feel just so upset...WHAT DO I DO!?!?!
I JUST HATE MY LIFE RIGHT NOW AND I WANT TO SCREAM.
I've thought of killing myself many, many times.
Right now, it just seems to be the best option.
I just can't figure out how to tell my parents I feel depressed, because they will probably just say that I'm over reacting. I know that there's something wrong.
(Sorry...my thoughts are all over the place. I'm too lazy to clean them up.)

[Sam W]

Hi whatshouldido,

I'm so sorry you've been feeling this way. The first thing I need to say is that if you are feeling the urge to hurt yourself, you need to go (or have someone take you) to the emergency room so you can get the care you need.

If you'd like, something we could try working on here is helping you figure out how to talk to your parents about what's going on. We could also talk about some other ways you could find support in your life. Do either of those sound helpful? Or is there something else you'd like to start with?

[EmilyDeeDubs]

I'm so sorry you've been dealing with these distressing events and feelings. I spent a lot of my teenage years feeling the same way, and I know this kind of despair can seem endless, but things do get better over time or simply change. Nothing stays the exact same for very long. That can be scary but it can also be a source of hope! If things are feeling scary or waiting seems impossible, though, there are some things you can do in the meantime to distract yourself and refocus. I'd start with this list of alternatives to self-injury: http://chooserecovery.tumblr.com/alternatives. Even if you don't struggle with urges to self-harm per se, a lot of these suggestions are helpful for redirecting physical urges and overwhelming emotions. Once you are feeling like you have some tools for coping it's also easier to think about ways to make life with other people more tolerable-- and there *are* ways to do this, even if it means finding new relationships and sources of support. You've taken a first step in doing that by coming here, so you're already on your way!

[Alice O]

Hi whatshouldido—

It sounds like you are going through a super tough time. I am so sorry!

Congratulations on reaching out on these message board though. That was a pretty awesome, brave thing to do.

I want to second everything Sam W and EmilyDeeDubs have shared regarding emergency room care and alternatives to self-harm. Your safety is of number one importance.

I also wanna say, I remember feeling a lot of these things during my middle and high school years too. And things really do get better as the world opens up a bit. I know in these moments of darkness it can be so hard to hold on to hope. But just like the previous comments said—things are always changing. It won’t be like this forever.

If you want to talk more about the depression you are feeling, or how to reach out to some older people who you trust, please don’t hesitate...